Lost

October 31st, 2014

Friends, I feel lost and need help discerning God’s guidance.

Of course, this story will sound petty, but if you feel moved to respond, please do.

A bit about me: I am a grad student and have lived apart from my family since I was very young. God called me to a beautiful city and I immediately knew it was home. I had prayed and prayed for meaningful friendships and for a life filled with love, and I finally found it. The fact that God had answered my prayers was profoundly evident and I was overwhelmed.

About a month ago, the love of my life broke up with me. Now, I understand that many of you may think that someone as young as I cannot possibly be sure to have found the love of my life. But my heart has lived a thousand lifetimes because of my background. I know what it’s like to love and lose – I have watched a boyfriend die slowly for weeks and finally, by the grace of God (truly), miraculously recover. I have watched my family suffer hardship after hardship and experience joy after joy as God’s will plays out. I believe that, a lot of times, I can hear what God is telling me really well, and I am careful to listen.

But now, I can’t seem to see God’s will for this situation. I found so much of God’s will in this now-defunct relationship and came to know the Lord in a beautiful new way. This man and I had just found our home church and were looking for the perfect couples devotional. Then, everything crumbled during a fight we had about the future. He seems to have panicked and withdrawn. Since then, our relationship (or lack thereof) has been one emotional rollercoaster after another.

I pray daily that God will guide my heart toward a resolution of this pain, whether back toward my ex, if it is His will, or toward peace and acceptance. All I have found is frustration and confusion. I still (fortunately or unfortunately) believe with all my heart that this man is the one God put on this earth for me to find, and I pray for the Lord to show me how to stop believing this because I feel so naïve. All worldly signs point to our mutual love being over, and I am confused by any and all Godly signs I receive.

Please, if you feel moved, respond. I am desperate to discern God’s will for this stage in my life and cannot seem to understand it myself. I understand that there is strength in faith in blind faith, and I accept that; I understand that God will may be my confusion and that He desires to test me. But still, I find no peace.

So, I’ve been working on gaining some financial insights using biblical principles, and have a story that I must share.  Yesterday, I was praying to God about what I should be doing to bring in more revenue (I’ve been working and sowing) yet I desire to have multiple nets to gain income.  Immediately, I believe God told me to go to my old job.  I instantly got up and went in to work… the problem was that I wasn’t on the schedule and haven’t been there in like 6 months (which isn’t too uncommon, its a part-time job at as hospital and we make our own schedules).  However, when I got ready to clock in, my badge number didn’t work…

So I began working anyway, and enjoyed the day.  I had not seen some of my old coworkers in a long time, and I got to do some really good work with the patients (its a psychiatric facility). Now here comes the banger…

About 15 min prior to the end of the shift, the charge nurse called me and asked how was it that I was there, yet I wasn’t on the schedule.  Fear set in, and I made up a lie.  At this point, I realized that I had missed God… which was confusing to me since the day had been SOOO GOOD!  Nevertheless, I finished the shift and hightailed it out of there, and felt guilty and ashamed for the rest of the night.  It wasn’t until today that I realized that I wasn’t supposed to work the shift, but I was just supposed to go get some information about an offer that someone in another department had me about a year ago… I just finished my master’s degree, and the new position required me to have certain credentials, which I now have.

Moral of the story, make sure you fully hear God before you step out on faith.  By making a move too quickly, you can easily get out of the Will of God for your life, and the Devil will use the opportunity to attack your righteousness and make you feel ashamed and guilty (condemnation) and try to convince you that God doesn’t LOVE you.  I know that all things work together for the good of those who love the Lord (Romans 8:28), i.e. the great time I had, and the counseling I did with the patients, yet that was not what I was supposed to be doing,… although everything seemed fine.

It’s sort of funny now, but I did not find much humor in it yesterday, I was actually feeling condemned all night… I even dreamt about it.  But joy came in the morning (Praise God) and I wanted to share my story.  The word says to confess your sins to one another that you may be healed (James 5:16)… and I thought this was the perfect place to do it.  I hope this helps someone. Also keep me in your prayers lol.

Sincerely,

A growing Christian : )

Finding Grace

October 22nd, 2014

My birth mother was only 16 when I was born. She gave me up for adoption and then took me back. She gave me up the second time when I was 8 months old and was adopted by a loving Christian family. My mom raised my sister and I up in church and my father didn’t go to church unless it was Christmas or Easter. I became heavily involved in church with choir and missions and church camp; but it wasn’t enough. I was just going through the motions. I was a hypocrite. I would be all about Jesus on Sundays and live every other day of the week the way I wanted.

When I was 14 I started dating guys behind my parents back. My first boyfriend was emotionally and verbally abusive; we dated for three years. I started cutting myself at 15 and at 16 someone noticed and got me help. My second boyfriend was physically abusive. Through all of that I started giving up on the whole religion thing.

When I started college. I completely stopped going to church. I began attempting ways to fill the void in my heart. I tried drugs and liquor and then I started jumping from relationship to relationship. One night I went to a party at my best friends house where I was drugged and raped by her brother’s best friend. When I told her she said I was a liar and if I said no he would have stopped. After that I slipped into a deep depression. My roommate would invite me to church and try to fix me the only way she knew how. I decided I needed to change the way I was doing things; I tried to change myself. So, I transferred schools and everything was going okay for a couple of months then I found my way into trouble again. This time I got caught. I was suspended from school.

That’s when I realized I couldn’t do it alone. I needed help. I cried out to God; He changed me. However, after all I did I kept thinking that I wasn’t good enough; I’m not worthy enough for God. I just kept thinking I don’t deserve Him. Finally, in 2013, I realized the truth in that. Yes, I am far from worthy and I am definitely not good enough. However, that is the truth in God’s grace. We were dead because of our sins and it is only by God’s grace that I am saved! God saved me by His grace when I believed and I can’t earn it because it is a gift from God. He loves me just as I am despite the sins of the past. Because He is rich in grace and mercy I am forgiven.

Dear Friend,

First of all I would thank you for sparing few minutes of your time to learn about miracles of Jesus Christ in my life. I assure you that this passage will help you find answers to many of your queries in life and about Jesus as well..!!

When someone asks me about my faith in Jesus, whom I claim to have changed my life radically, I take no time to smile back and say – ‘without Jesus, you had no Timothy around you this day to ask this question..!!’ That much is the impact of Jesus Christ on my life. It was then painful every day before HE came into my life but now every minute has turned into joy..!!

My association with Jesus Christ is 13 years old and in course of time, I have never neither felt alone nor forbidden from HIS mightiest love. This great love of Jesus has empowered me to cross many hurdles, multiple milestones and claim blessings after blessings in my life and into other’s life as well. Yes! It is Jesus Christ who led me all the way in this victorious life and it was HE, who was with me in my every fall and rise in all these years. His strong hand has never neither let me down nor left me alone. Instead, blessed me to be a blessing to others! Read the rest of this testimony »

God Healed Me from Herpes 2

October 19th, 2014

Hi all! Ive been eager to share my testimony with the world so here it goes. Growing up i was raised to worship God due to my parents. I remember as a very young child my siblings and I were forced to go to church until i was saved and accepted Jesus Chris into my life. Although after being saved I went back to the world and found myself being in two waters. Long story short I found myself in a relationship with this guy for a long time until things broke off. He was the only guy I’ve been with n lost my virginity to.

Until one day after graduating high school one of my friends and i went to a party, which of course God was not there only the devil. I ended up getting drunk and having lust for one particular guy at the party. I’ve only been with one guy and was curious to know what was like to have sex with another person. This only came to thought after we bonded in the party. One thing lead to another and the devil ended up getting the best of me that night. After we had sex one of his friends told me he put a pill in my drink which helped me reason why I got so drunk. I remember seeing myself in a corner of the party feeling so alone and scared. Two weeks later I ended up feeling a really uncomfortable pain down my privacy as if I had a yeast infection. I completely ignored it but something inside me told me something was wrong. So all I did was pray.

Three weeks later I felt an enormous burn down my private area and each day was worse. I thought please God dont let it be a std just some kind of bacterial infection. I ended up sharing my issue and pain to my parents n older sis. I didnt know what I had until I went to the clinic and was told I had herpes. Depression hit me like never before I looked up at the wall and there was a portrait of Jesus I felt hope and Gods embrace all around. Although I was only 18 n thought wow is this really happening to me ive only slept with two guys I argued with God n then said sorry.

My dad suddenly spoke to our pastor and the pastor made the decision to bring a minister to pray for all the sick. That Sunday after the service was over the minister than called all sick to the alter and my dad came up with me praying as well. The minister that was invited to our church then said your faith will heal you in 15 days the ones with faith will be healed, so mark down each day in your calendar.

On the 15 day before I woke up. God revealed me a dream of about 30 people in a body of water as if we were getting baptized. I tried to look at the minister in my dream but a light surrounded him I couldn’t see his face but his white cloth he raised me from the water and I felt born again. I woke up from the dream I realized todays the 15 day I’m healed. I ran to the bathroom because I had my period but this time. I had no outbreak I usually got an outbreak or felt a burn when I had my period.

My faith was super strong that I ran to my dad hugged him and said

“Dad I’m healed.”

He said ok and was speechless. 7 years have passed and I’ve never gotten an outbreak again. I’ve gone to clinics to test me specifically in herpes after and twice two different clinics said I tested negative. God bless you all God is real and almighty turn your life to him in purity have faith. There’s nothing wrong to pray for faith .You are just important believe in your God and he will give you the eternity if you ask and believe in him. I love you God is forever with you. Amen

Hello Readers….Travis Campbell, Poetry Testimony…

All of my past, was a life lived fast. Selling drugs and making money were my daily first and last
A twisted life Travis chosed to be living, which had me trapped with a mindset of always dealing
I stayed lost to the streets just going in circles, hood rich was my thing just stuck in that game
I never knew a way out except death or jail, thousands upon thousands what we were daily making in sells.
The cops stayed on the loose looking to fill another jail cell.
I can’t take no more, but that money keep calling,
I can’t take no more, but those drugs keep coming.
Blood in blood out, I stayed on the inside looking out,
I was trapped in that worldly system if you know what I’m talking about
At such a young age my life of selling major drugs seemed to be the thing to me,
6 figure money with an abundance of materialistic possessions.
Little did I know where this life style would take me and even do to me.

Truth be told, I have been in jail 76 times, shot very badly on 3 seperate occassions, I even died 4 times, had 20 major operations, spent over 3 and a half years in the hospital, and even found myself homeless do to my poor choices while addicted to the drugs that I once were selling. Now on the other hand, God saw fit to protect me and keep me through all of my mess. Thanks be to God after doing a year in Miami County jail in 2005-2006 my lovely sister provided a way of escape for me.

I found myself on an airplane Feb 18, 2006 headed to Atlanta to be picked up by Pastor, Waymon Johnson to be welcomed at New Birth Ministry to begin my journey with Christ for “CHANGE”. I whole heartedly accepted Christ Jesus into my life on Feb 19, 2006 and since then I found myself following after Him through it all..I have gained a sense of worth and I live daily with a purpose to Glorify Christ in all I do.

I completed my year at New Birth on Feb 18, 2007. I chose to stay on my journey, because I know for a fact that time spent waiting on Jesus is time that’s never wasted. I’ve been blessed with an opportunity to attend Alabama Bible College where I became an ordained minster. I minister to adults and youth…At the present, I attend Southern Union Community College majoring in computer science, because I love computers..I also have a heart to encouraged others no matter who they are. Now, none of this would have been possible, because Travis couldn’t do it on his own…

You read up above were I said I never knew a way out the drug game except by death or being in jail, but God is so able to do the unthinkable. All glory goes to God for making what was impossible, possible for me..A “CHANGED MAN” set free from all hang ups and habits…

Testimony for God’s glory

October 17th, 2014

God bless you all. I would like to share this testimony with you to God’s glory. A few months back I did some shopping and afterwards got in a taxi. The taxi was still waiting for other people to get in. During this time I all of a sudden felt like I wanted to pass out. Not knowing what was going on, I got out of the taxi and made my way to a public restroom to wash off my face.

I felt a little bit better after that, and took other taxi home. I phoned my husband and he told me that I should go lie down. I did as he said and also listened to a sermon of the prophet during that time. By the time my husband got home I was fine. I was a little bit shook up by this experience since I didn’t know what was happening that moment.

This situation repeated itself a couple of times again. I can remember when I was alone at home and I all of a sudden felt like passing out again.This time it felt worse than before. I text my husband and asked him to pray for me immediately. I had a lot of work to do at home so I just put on the tape “Taking God at His Word” and start washing the floors, still feeling like I want to pass out. I afterwards just started to sing God’s praises. I probably felt like that for more than an hour. Praise the Lord, by the time I needed to go fetch my children at school I was well.

Well, the other day while I was on my way fetching the kids at school. This horrible thing wanted to attack me again worse than ever before. I don’t know why but it made me think when Jesus was about to cast out an evil spirit out of a boy how he had a fit like never before. While waiting for my children at school, I could only stand on God’s Word. It was a fight but the Lord see me through just like He did the other times. Arriving home I put a prayer cloth on and continued making something to eat for my children. All the while still feeling not nice.

Then out of nowhere, I don’t know how, but I just accepted my healing. That thing just went away from me. I’m so thankful to the Lord for delivering me. I do not have words to described my joy.

I hope that this might have encouraged someone.

Sis.Marily

I was angry with God. I wanted to know why I had gone from an outgoing, smart, academic girl to nothing… My soul was broken,my marks dropped and my parents seemed to love my brother more than me. I wished for death but short lived moments of happiness killed me more…

I gave my life to him, I thought. Burned a paper with all my sins in a fire but yet still continued to hoard them. Life was good and bad and then tumbled into worse.”Christians tend to suffer more than non Christians – just look at Jesus” but I didn’t want to suffer. I still continued to suffer and it was in those moments I left God to swim in my sorrows that I drowned. I left God thinking he’d let things go back to normal but the more I stayed away the more he made me need him.

I prayed, danced and worshiped but inside I could not trust his plan and when my finishing school marks came I came crushing down like a house without a foundation. Whilst my friends displayed their marks with pride I hid my tears and shouted at God. He had not answered my prayers like he said he would nor did he come to  my aid when I looked for him.

I thought he didn’t want universities to accept me, I thought he put unpleasant people in my life to hate me, I thought he wanted to prove to my parents that I was a failure but that wasn’t the case.

I’m in the process of having my college application approved even though I do t have the marks to do the course. I’m in the process of  building a business empire that is sure to provide financial relief to my family-which I wouldn’t have thought of if I’d gone to college. I’m about to be confirmed. I’ve seen my self confidence rise over the past few months. I haven’t been spending time in devotion but everyday I say I prayer to God. Letting him know I need him and trust him and that I’m thankful for the cross and my burdens are no longer mine to carry.

Job is the only book I can relate to really and I hope I can be as faithful as him when it comes to being tested by God!!!!! I hope one day God is able to say that my baby girl can handle anything you throw at her!!!

Thank you for reading

God bless

I am in love with a girl. She is the one person that really completes me, most caring, hardworking, prayerful & beautiful person I have ever met.

But she also does live in a different continent. Her family relocated 4 years ago to the other end of the world. She is a student, working and paying for higher education.

Let me start from the beginning. We met about 6 years ago at a church event. We started talking almost daily on phone and became really good friends. She lived in a nearby town. A few months after we met, I told her that I wanted us to be more than friends but she told me she didn’t feel the same about me & she was already in a relationship. I was heartbroken. Our communication stopped. We didn’t speak for almost a year. I never got over her, believe me I tried. I got into a few relationships thereafter but I could just not find someone like her. They were always short and lacked depth. Eventually I decided to stop chasing after a fulfilling relationship altogether and just be.

So almost 2 years after we met, she called me and wanted to meet me, perhaps mend things before she & her family left. We did meet the day before her departure and it was a very bitter-sweetest moment. I felt like a part of me had been ripped off. I know it was also difficult for her. We promised to always pray for each other.

They left. All this time she was still with the boyfriend. I then came to know that they tried to keep their long distance relationship active via Skype etc, but it was strenuous. It came to a point where he didn’t trust her, said she had changed etc. Then I believe they broke up.

2 years later, she reached out to me, we started communicating a few times. Then a year ago, I decided to take my prayer life more seriously and started doing a Bible plan (for reading the entire Bible for a year using a popular android bible app). I thought it was something she might be interested in (she had always been the prayerful one, much more than me). When I told her about the reading plan, I found that she had actually started one just a few days before me, so she decided to delay her reading plan so I could catch up. We then started praying Novenas together, week after week with each person taking a turn at finding a Novena.

And that leads to my situation at the moment. She regards me as a friend, nothing more. I don’t think she is in a relationship, and if she is she’s kept it to herself.

At any time when we have talked about our future plans and getting married, I’ve always told her that I am waiting to meet the right person and hope to start a married life soon. For her she also says that she’s also waiting on the Lord to meet the right person, but that her focus right now is school and work, she gets very busy and it can be very demanding sometime. She has another 3 or so years to finish campus. I on the other hand I finished school a few years ago and I’m in employment. She is a year younger than me.

But she always encourages me to date, even sounds happy at the prospect of me getting a girlfriend etc.

I feel that she really is the one for me. I don’t want to ruin our friendship or make things uncomfortable by telling her how I feel, considering that she did in the past tell me that she saw me as a friend and nothing more.

And even If I were to, I know that long distance relationships are not easy, and considering that hers and her ex failed, I really don’t want to place that burden on her, should she be willing to. I am willing to wait for her until she finishes school or until the time she comes back, if she decides to, if I were to know whether our relationship stands a chance of becoming something more.

I really don’t know what to do at this point. Advice?

Preaching God’s word

October 14th, 2014

Hallo, I am now 18 years old, A few months ago I was doing as if I was preaching, and I felt this amazing love in me. I was saying that God has us in our heart and telling God’s grace that he loves us and has us in our heart, and I said in phillipians 1:7 it say that God that he has us in our heart” and I quickly searched for the bible vers and indeed it was correct, I couldn’t believe what was happening to me I had a really awesome feeling.

In phillipians 1:7 “For it is only right for me to feel this way about you all, because I have you in my heart, since both in my imprisonment and in the defense and confirmation of the gospel, you all are partakers of grace with me.”

Wow I couldn’t believe that I just quoted the right bible verse where at least the word heart was inside. It felt very well and I felt God’s love surrounding me very awesome. However I barely read the bible so I actually never read that chapter before and suddenly the good bible verse came. Is this a gift or just per coincidence. I think it is the holy spirit who is with me. What’s your opinion?