Fighting Porn

May 20th, 2010

Hi, I am Gideon, and English is not my first language. Here is my testimony.

I began to surf internet for photos. I started to look at girls in swimsuit. I was a porn addict many years before, and I managed to quit after asking the Lord to intervene. But this time, it is different. I thought it was harmless for me to do.

Worse, I am a singer in church worship. I began to become more aggressive in searching for photos on internet. I do all this in my room, alone and nobody is watching. I began to exchange holiness with pornography. It is when I started to entertain thoughts of oral sex only then I began to find out how to fight porn. I found out I was not alone. I knew the verse: … if your eye caused you to lust, gorge it out. But it made little impact on me.

Anyway, God is real.

He revealed to my pastor that I’ve sinned, that is I didn’t stay holy. So, when it was my turn to sing in worship, my pastor changed the scheduled revealing there is a reason for him to do so. And he preached about holiness. I was ashamed. I got the message: God caught me with my pants down!

So I quit cold turkey. No more porn for me. Just like that. Now I look at the other way whenever I see pictures of girls in nude/semi-nude. I also try to stay aloof by downplay them in my mind.

But for some reason I didn’t strongly regret what I did. Somehow it seems that I’ve little regard of sin. Now I pray that the spirit of repentance comes so strongly upon me that I would not do it again! Life is too short to exchange for eternal shame! Praise to God! Amen!

2 Responses to “Fighting Porn”

  1. Thomas Says:

    Hello Gideon,

    You must confess your sin to people too. Perhaps your pastor or other strong Christian men. This will bring it to light and break the chains of pride and hiding that can hold you to this sin. Your sin happened in private and you hid it so you must take it to the light and renounce it. When you are honest and humble the Lord can lift you up. The evil one uses hidden sins to strengthen the bondage to pornography and other private sins.

  2. deborah Says:

    If many people realized the misery and horror in the lives of those women most who have been abused as children they may think twice about feasting on them.

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