August 5th, 2012
God bless you all. I would like to share my testimony to the glory of God and hoping that it might be an encouragement to everyone that will read it. I’m ashamed to say that I struggled to forgive. I used to be the person that remember past hurts and that could’nt figure out why some people or person would do such and such. I wanted to forgive but how do you forgive someone the one day for a certain thing and the next day they are at it again without a “I am sorry” or “Forgive me”
My mind was occupied with wondering “How could this person do this?” or with the pain that was caused, and the fact that I had no one to just seek advice from except The Lord, to which I’m thankful for. My heart was filled with so much pain and wanting to understand what’s going on here. I mean forgiving someone today seemed no great big deal, and tomorrow yeah I believe I can do that, and next week, okay..but for months…continually just forgiving, forgiving …..and forgiving,( is’nt that what God is doing everyday with us) and did I mention that’s without someone coming back to you to admit they were wrong or sorry. But that’s just exactly what The Lord wanted me to do. God told me not to build a complex towards this person. I tried, but it only lasted a few weeks. I thought I had forgive but my actions did not show any forgiveness. I treated this person according to the hurt I was experiencing. My unforgiveness came between me and my God.
Then one day I was walking on my way to sort out some business; and all of a sudden I felt that I wanted to pass out any moment. I almost phoned my husband to come fetch me but rather this is what I said “ Lord forgive me for not forgiving this person, I promise to serve You with all my heart, please help me”. And that is what the Lord did, He helped me, nothing happened to me, I felt just fine afterwards. I knew it was because of me not forgiving that I was having that experience.
But alas, still I needed to learn how to forgive. A few weeks after that I went to the Library. The Lord directed me to a certain book that contained information concerning forgiveness. I read it and what I read touched me so deeply that it brought the change in me. I looked up some scriptures in the Bible concerning forgiveness and printed it out, as a reminder. I prayed telling God that I forgive that person, that I choose to forgive. Immediately my mind was set free of all the pasts hurts, it just disappeared. Yes…it disappeared under the Blood. I felt free, I still do. No longer am I treating this person according to his/her actions. But according to God’s Word. God’s grace and mercy and undying Love for me helped me to let go of UNFORGIVENSS.