Testimony Share

Hello my friends, my name is Ricky, I’m 20 years old, live in the United Kingdom’s and I’ve been a born again Christian for over 2 years now.

This is my story.

At the age of 1 and 2 years old, me and my older brother were adopted by my Grandparents. The reason we were adopted was because my mother and father were unable to look after us, our mother was suffering from severe depression and mental health issues and would reject us and our father was a heroin addict and a drunk.

I never saw much of my Dad growing up, just some memories I have where he’d stumble into my Grandparents house drunk or high on something and pass out in front of us and my friends, it was no wonder my friends parents didn’t let us play with them after moments like that.

I didn’t have a mother-son relationship with my Mum until I was around the age of 15 but before then I didn’t even know her name.

Growing up for me was hard, emotionally and sometimes physically, even though our Grandparents spoilt us so much, they couldn’t do anything when I use to go to school. I got severe bullied every day for 4 years in primary school(middle school in you’re American) in fact the only happy memories I had of school was when the bell rang at 3pm and I’d be the first one out of the door running into the arms of my Granddad who’d be wearing his big dorky glasses! Man, I’d never forget those glasses..

My Granddad passed in 1999 and it really tore our family apart my Nan had to look after two young children by herself and she was already retired and old (bless her heart) she did a great job but majority of the time she struggled, with two boys in the house, we needed a father figure and we never got one so we controlled the house growing up and I use to force my Nan into buying us expensive things and got her into so much debt.

High school wasn’t different either for me, we couldn’t really afford nice uniforms so we’d get the old ones which were sometimes ripped or smelly and everybody use to laugh at me for it, it wasn’t nice and before I knew it I started getting physically bullied every day, I was the small smelly kid who didn’t fight back so I was an easy target for most people.

When I use to get home from school my Nan could see I was being bullied but I never told her, I didn’t want to upset her but then my frustration from being bullied just exploded on her, I use to shout at her, scare her and even hit her. I was such a lost child – all I wanted was a father to help me with my boy problems but I never got it.

It was the year 2003 when we had a knock at the door, it was the police and they told us that my Dad had killed himself and to be told that at my age literally destroyed me and my innocence. After that night I started getting depressed – I dropped out of high school and started hanging out with the guys on the streets, in fact it was the guys who use to bully me but when I started to do what they did, drink, steal, break things etc they I guess accepted me into the ‘gang’ as it was. I was now 15 when I started hanging around on the streets.

After 3 years of contently on the streets drinking, fighting, stealing, sleeping with women and then some, I thought to myself that I’m not getting anywhere and there must be something in life better than this.

In 2006 I enrolled myself into College, College in the UK is just another version of high school in the USA, it’s free and the same age 16+ I didn’t know how to read and write at the time so I thought going to College would help me, which it did and it was great at times.

In my first year of College, my life had two major moments, the first one was when I met a guy called Dean, he knew who I was from stories and things from the streets and one day at College he randomly invited me to a Football match (Soccer to the Americans reading this) If you don’t know, Football in the UK is the main sport and there is a lot of violence in it, that’s what I got into, the violence not the sport.

After about 6 or 7 months of petty football violence I got really tired of drinking early, wasting my money going around the country to watch my team play and I got really tired of getting beat up by a group of guys! So towards the end of my first year I left that side of football behind and started focusing on College again.

About a month of just getting head dip in College work, I met a girl called Tracey, she ended up being my first real girlfriend, I was so excited and happy! Previous years I’d just be a joke to a girl or a drunken mistake but now at that time a girl was actually interested in me, for me! I was over the moon!

Anyway after all the loveable ‘aww’s’ in the relationship out of nowhere she fell pregnant, it was a shock for us both, we were both young and this was both our first times so we had no idea what to do. I always thought I’d be a good Dad because I was never good at anything else in my life but when a child was around me, I’d look after him or her like a hawk and make sure they were happy and enjoying themselves and I thought I could of done that with my child.

After we told my girlfriends parents they strongly disagreed with it and told Tracey that if she doesn’t get an abortion she will get kicked out of her house, Tracey was so scared she felt she had no choice in the matter and before talking about it she went and got an abortion – which destroyed me and broke my heart so much.

After months and months of fighting me and Tracey were just about to break up, it didn’t happen because she told me she was pregnant and after that even though I didn’t want the relationship with her I felt that I needed to stay because I didn’t want my baby growing up like me without a father so I stayed.

It eventually happened and we broke up, it was such a horrible and heart destroying break-up. I felt like I had no hope and no reason to live. Tracey took my son away from me and spread lies about me which the police then got involved and told me I’m not allowed within a 100feet of her. She just lied so much and I didn’t know what to do.

After a while of drinking and just falling apart I met this girl in my last year of College – she wasn’t like any other girl I met, she was different and we eventually became really good mates.

She could see that I needed healing so she invited me to Church one day, I turned her down a good 6 times or so but after a while I felt I needed to go.

Coming to Church for the first time with somebody like me was totally alien, I didn’t know what to expect or think really, I just thought Christians were all just crazy Bible bashing freaks, ha!

When I arrived at this Church the leaders were so welcoming and loving, I’ve never been welcomed into a place before and I just felt so much love coming from them and after 2 months of going I really wanted to know how I can be happy like them and I really wanted to know who this Jesus guy was they were talking about all the fricking time!!!!

About a month or so later after asking for help they really got along side me and started teaching me about Jesus and the Bible and invited me to places all the time. It was great! I thought I was making so many great friends and I eventually said I would like to become a Christian – but I didn’t do it with all my heart – at first it was just a thing to make new friends, maybe even meet a nice Christian girlfriend and I loved the free gifts.

I was in a sermon once and I learnt I was forgiven for everything I have done and before anybody could even explain it to me properly I thought with an immature mind that I can still drink and sleep around and be forgiven because I still loved doing that, so I did! I carried on sleeping with women every weekend, drinking heavily and getting drunk.

I remember talking to my best friend and telling him what I’ve been doing, told him about Jesus and how we are forgiven for everything we have done so we can still do bad – he took one look at me and said ‘’Ricky, YOU ARE NOT DOING IT RIGHT!!!!!!!’’ I said to him, ‘’what do you mean I’m not doing it right? I’ve forgiven so it’s all good’’ He just left shaking his head and told me to grow up, I got so offended with him! I was like ‘’ How dare he say I’m not doing it right! I’m forgiven, I can do whatever I want!’’

The next few weeks that was still in my head, I was thinking to myself, am I doing it right? What is the right way? And one night the most amazing, most beautiful thing ever happened. I found myself at 1am on the bottom of my bed randomly praying to a God I didn’t fully believe in, I couldn’t control my words, they just came out, I said to the Lord that I want to really know him, I want Him and only Him and I want to find my identity in Him and nothing else. I prayed for a good hour or so and after I was finished the Holy Spirit came rushing into me for the first time in my life and all I remember that night was I cried so much, so much was healed that night, all my problems, all my fears just instantly went, it felt like it wasn’t in my hands no more.

I felt so alive! I just knew Jesus Christ is Lord and HE DIED FOR ME! I was so happy I just felt at peace with everything. I became a Christian that night in November 2009. It was the most amazing moment in my life, even better than the birth of my son.

After that, within these 2 years I found my calling as a street evangelised and my heart is for the broken, the lost, and the poor. If I can describe my calling in a Bible verse it’ll be this exact one

Luke 4: 18-19 which says ”The Spirit of the Lord is on me, because he has anointed me to proclaim good news to the poor. He has sent me to proclaim freedom for the prisoners and recovery of sight for the blind, to set the oppressed free, to proclaim the year of the Lord’s favor”

I could go on all night about what things Jesus has done for me in these two years but I just want to leave you with this

The night I became a Christian felt like I came home for the first time in years being away from it. My God is a faithful God and He healed my pain. He can heal yours, will you let Him? God bless my friends.

The truth is He lives in each one of us! He is there always and when we are at our darkest hour. I’ve had some very big ups and downs in my lifetime, once I was on my belly praying to the Lord and have felt his grace upon me. When we are open to him we can know he is there. As it was said we only need faith the size of a mustard seed to move a mountain, imagine what faith is capable of.

My husband recently went into the Dr. for side pain (longtime smoker) and received Xray results, they told him they had found a 2mm spot in his lung and wanted him to take another xray while awaiting the authorization for a CT scan.   My husband wept, I wept and then I prayed and I prayed over him and as I was praying over him I saw Jesus and his hands moving in unison with mine to touch my husband’s side.

It was a miracle and the beauty of it is indescribable.  My husband always looks to the bible, and this time he looked to the book for our heavely Father’s words to speak to him now in this time of despair and confusion, He found 2 verses in Acts that gave him encouragement, meanwhile I had by chance been overhearing a sermon by Joel Osteen concerning Hezekiah and Isaiah. If you have read about King Hezekiah you know he was told to prepare his house for his death and he began to tell God he had done so much for him, eventually praying and praising God giving thanks to the Father and God granted Hezekiah 15 more years. It was a calling of the Holy Spirit for me to pass onto my husband the story of King Hezekiah and to remind my husband of repentance and mercy.

My husband spent time with God one evening away from the family (we have 3 small children) and prayed and praised the Lord. 2 days later we recieved the results of the second Xray, they were NORMAL. PRAISE GOD, THANK GOD FOR HE IS MERCIFUL This is just one of the miraculous doings of our heavenly Father, I remember to give praise to Jesus for he is the Way the Truth and the Life and none come to the Father but through him. One thing I’m certain of, is God’s Grace, Jesus Lives,  Believe in Him, He believes in you!

The Lord WILL bless you

The Lord WILL bless you

The Lord WILL keep you

The Lord WILL cause His covenants to come upon you and be gracious to you

The Lord GRANTS you His SHALOM, His completeness in your spirit, in your soul and in your body, in the name of JESUS, the messiah

Praise the Lord,

Glory to Jesus Christ, halleluiah…..blessed friends, today I have experienced the wonderful  love of our heavenly beloved father through Jesus Christ, I call Jesus as my papa, my abba, my love, my life, my Jesus and my everything.

At noon time,  I sat for my prayer as i was feeling low an in need of Jesus as always, i prayed Jesus I dont know how to love you, bible tells us to love you but im not strong enough to love the almighty God the creator of heaven and earth, its easy to say but i feel we all fall short in loving God for our love is nothing compared to His love for us, so i said…papa please teach me to love you, i want you to take delight in me,  though im not capable of loving you with all my heart being weak humanbeing but i boldly ask you to teach me to love you anyway and also teach me how to SEEK YOU so that all the good things will be added to my life ( i know Jesus i want my desires to be met and so i wanna seek you so that my desires will be met)  please teach me how to love you and how to seek you because i can not do it on my own.

Now friends,

In this prayer, my intention was that i wanted my desires to be met, even in my prayer i was being self centered and now i tell you what happened……

Just as i was in the middle of praying, i felt this amazing closeness to Jesus, like he had wrapped his arms around me with so much of love, so much of belongingness, so much of peace and i felt this incredible feeling that i was so soooooooooo close to Jesus Christ my abba, i heard my momma callin me to help her out but i felt as if my Jesus was not letting me go, he still had his arms around me, saying…..I love you my Child, your  apple of my eye, i have made an everlasting covenant of LOVE with you, i showered my blood on you and so your all MINE, my precious lovable Daughter your father loves you so much, i will never leave you nor forsake you.

I was so so amazed at this beautiful love Christ has for me, friends i can not express how i felt in these words, oh how i wish you would feel this love, and yes YOU WILL if you just call your abba and tell him to hug you.

All my life, i was crying for this love, i was craving for this love, i felt so incomplete without this love, i was praying for my soulmate thinking he will make me feel complete and so i kept on praying for a soulmate egarly for 1 n half years, i never understood what God meant when he said through a prophet to me that He WILL satisfy my longingness, but today friends…..God proved it right, my abba came and hugged me pouring out all his abundant love on me, truly i can not express it into words, this love  is FAR FAR FAAAAAARRRRRRRRRR MILLION TIMES ABUNDANT, EVERLASTING, PUREST OF PURE, AMAZING, SPEECHLESS LOVE of JESUS my Abba that can not be found in no one else.

Now i know what it means to LOVE GOD, i love you Jesus i love you sooooooooo much HUGSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS

So friends, never think your alone, you do not need nobody’s love more than the Love of Christ which satisfies your Soul with his everlasting and abundant love, i know my soulmate is there in our spritual country governed by Christ and he will come to me at Abba’s appointed time  till then im sooooooooo happy in my singleness as I am LOVED so much by Christ already.

Father bless you, SHALOM.

Hello all…
So i’m just going to go straight to it! I did my undergraduation away from home and joined a local Church in this new place.
There was an older member in the youth fellowship who I was quite pally with. I wasn’t particularly close to anyone at Church but everyone was a friend to me. Basically, I take a while to open up and can be quite reserved sometimes which is sometimes a result of my own insecurities.
Anyways, this guy in my fellowship ( 8 yrs older than me ) initiated messaging me and calling me up once in a while.I used to initially think that maybe he was just trying to get me more involved in the fellowship etc…but then I realised it was a little more than that but I was never really sure. He implied things indirectly but never just straight upfront. So, I was never really sure. And also the messaging and calling was intermittent. As in, there would be silence for a while and then a random spurt of messages to try and stay in touch. Anyways, it can be a really heading feeling for a girl to know
that someone older is interested in you! especially if He’s a Christian too and we were both very musically inclined.

Anyways, nothing really happened for about 2 and a half years!! just a few very memorable conversations and some special moments…and let me tell u that even at this point i wasn’t like a 100% sure whether he was into me. Anyways, I think I started praying to God to take away my feelings for him if they weren’t meant to be. I know there were times when I might have been low and a small message from him could light up my world! but at the same time whilst at Church I couldnt really truly worship God when he was around cos I was a little too conscious of his presence, the whole heart racing thing and all!! so, i didnt really know whether he was a distraction or whether he was part of God’s plan.I still continued to pray about it. We did go out once and it was really nice but even then he didn’t explicitly tell me anything just implied stuff.

As I was about to return home after my graduation I asked him about his feelings upfront. Well not upfront per se but on my mobile! he said he did like me but didnt want to play around. He wanted things to grow and just see how things worked out. I guess he was a bit confused too.Let me tell you, this was the first time I was a 100% sure that he was into me, until ten it was just really really strong guesses!

I headed back home hoping to stay in touch, still praying about this. Long and short, no concrete steps were made with regards to us and I really prayed to God to close the door, cos thoughts about him were taking up too much space in my head.  So, basically there was still intermittent messaging and calling but nothing solid. But there was real connection when we did talk.

Anyways, I didn’t really know what to do, I was slowly getting upset that nothing more was happening. I didnt know whether he was playing around, whether he was not ready, whether it was not God’s time or whether it was not part of God’s plan at all. I travelled abroad to do my PG and called him before I left. I thought that would give me some closure and I felt like I needed to move on but there were still very strong feelings.

He got in touch with me via email. That says somethig doesn’t it? At least I felt it did, I felt it would go somewhere. But, right now I find myself pining for him too much and it’s affecting me, but at the same time he seems like the ideal guy and I’m like maybe God brought this to pass. I’m quite confused. A part of me tells me, I should just stop contact with him altogether cos at the moment it’s not leading to anything solid but at the same time, there are these very strong feelings and this guy feels like home for me somewhere at the end of the day. Basically, I cannot tell what is right and wrong. I dont really need relationship advice but am in desperate need for some christian counsel.

hello, my name is tessy. this is my story, I and my partner have been dating for two years before i relocated to america, and when i moved we started having conflicts. he started to abuse me verbally. well i foolishly made the mistake of dating someone else without breaking it off with him, and I honestly told him.he did everything to get me out of that relationship. and i did. shortly after i thought maybe we would both change and move on, but he continued abusing me.and i started dating another person. yes i know i was wrong. well this may i went to england to see him and we had sex, the first time i came, and few times after that, he told me he was feeling funny. and we went to the hospital and got tested. it was chlamydia and we both got treated. but then after i went to church and i listen to a sermon that change my life for good. and i told my boyfriend that i wanted to serve God, i dont want to have sex with him or any other man. i gave my life to God and i never had sex with him, and we stayed in the same house for two months, he got mad sometimes, and he will hit me, slap me, or even do worse things to me. when my holiday was over, on my way to catch my flight he apologized for all he did and proposed to me.but i turned it down. telling him we need more time. well after i got back to the state, we both decided to go and retest to make sure everything was fine. and we both did, his result came out negative, and my result was positive for herpes hsv 1. and i was shocked, because i never had anything to do with another man apart from him. well i did not tell him my result was positive. because i still don’t want to accept it. well it was two days ago i go my result. and me and him broke up just yesterday, because i figured he doesn’t love me anymore and he constantly abuse me. so i decided to move on.so today i started to google can God heal me. and i saw this site. i believe in God work.but i wonder why is it now that i decided to follow Jesus that this disease came along. i know and trust that God will heal me.please i want you guyz to help pray for me. i will go into fasting and prayers and ask him to forgive me for all my wrong deeds.thank you all for reading.

I am a strong believer in Christ and I named Him as my savior.  I am a Sophomore  in college and I love Chemistry a lot which is actually my major. One of my biggest dreams is to become a medical doctor and work in undeveloped countries where  there is a big shortage of medical doctors.   I decided to major in Chemistry but the road has been challenging. I have always believed in doing something that I am passionate about and this is Chemistry. I plan on going to medical school right after I graduate. However, medical schools are very competitive and my grades have been bad because the Calculus and Physics put my grade point average very low and yet Im performing really well in my other courses.

I accepted Christ this past summer when I went to India to volunteer working with orphans from this non profit organisation.  The road of my faith has been getting shaken each time I am in trouble like this. I cry everyday, I have lost weight, I have endless assignments everyday and I feel like I have no life.  I am currently on a full scholarship and I have to keep at least a 3.0 gpa to be considered for it each semester. So far I have a 2.81 and God already made a miracle by not letting my scholarship taken away. My parents dont like me and I financially support myself and the help of friends.

I have though of committing suicide many times but I always tell myself that God hasnt failed me yet. I read the Bible everyday , each nite and each morning before I go to clas but it seems what I asked the Lord to do for me hasn’t been done. Because of this, I have been doubting a lot but at the same time I know God is faithful until the end. This semester,  I am scared , in fear because my PA is going down soon since im failing Calculus and Physics. Since I am pre-med, these classes are required and I cant imagine giving up my dream of wanting to go to medical school just because of these subjects.

I am scared that my scholarship will be taken away and the road to medical school will not be possible. I am faithful that the Lord will deliver me from this trouble. I feel like giving up sometimes but I cant because so many people like my parents want me to fail. my father kicked me out of the house when in high school and now I live with my high school teacher. My mom died and have nobody who can support me. Most of the people who are helping right now are expecting me to do well in school and accomplish my dream and be able to support myself.

As i type this, I am crying. I sleep about 4,5 or even less only studying and putting my best effort. I get tutoring which is only 30 minutes session once a day but sometimes I cant make it because I have classes. This Monday i will be getting my Physics test back and Im so scared that I feel like quitting right now and drop out of college.  The lord is faith again and I keep telling myself this. God didnt just put me in college and then abandon me. I believe that he can help me and I need to trust in HIm.  I am waiting for God to do a miracle on my final exams so that I can have a descent GPA and grades. Please friends, pray for me and I believe that the almighty will help me. God is faithful and He will not leave me. thank you

Hello there brothers and sisters! I have never shared my testimony but feel that this is the place where I should do it. Since I was a small child I had always been a very fearful child, I would be playing in the play ground and burst into tears and then had episodes of anxiety and depression. I would always stick to my mom always thinking what ifs…then my mother shared with me as I grew older that even when she was pregnant with me she took on my characteristics and knew how I felt. School was my only escape because I loved learning and as the years went by I never thought of anything that had happened.

Then one night 4 days after my 18th birthday I had my first panic attack. See this horrible ailment runs in my family my dad has taken medication for it for about 30 years right about the time my mom gave birth to me. After this I had 3 other major episodes followed by depression, anxiety, and panic attacks. In every single one Jesus would heal me but I would go the worldy ways I became very lustful and practiced sexual immorality and still called myself a Christian. Sexual Immorality is the worst as the apostole paul says in all other sin we practice outside the body but sexual immorality is practiced with the temple of the Holy Spirit. You see sometimes in our families there are chains that bind us. In the bible God says that those who do not accept him will experience his wrath for up to 5 generations but the great news is that if you accept him he promises blessings for up to 1000 generations.

The last time I was severely depressed, which was July of 2011, the LORD showed me so much. Even after being a wishy washy Christian the LORD showed me how my past family has always been so sexually immoral. In being depressed I felt alone because I had been through 4 major depressions in the lapse of 6 years followed with anxiety and fear. But I thank the LORD because he gave me a gift I didn’t deserve, his unending and unfailing love and forgiveness. In the begining it was hard for me to share my testimony but now I know that the LORD through his son Jesus does miracles. The LORD has taken me further that I deserve or saw myself.

For the people who are reading this even though the enemy lies to you saying God isn’t there pray out loud! recite scriptures from the bible with your mouth. Don’t overthink faith let God be the judge of that. Go to church, always thank him for the things people take for granted like loving others, eating, being able to sleep seeing the beautiful sun, being able to read, to testify, to sing. When in my former depression I was unable to eat, sleep was hard sometimes, love was difficult to feel, singing became non-existant. Always look for the greater things in life like his son Jesus, family, flowers, your eyesight, enjoying food, singing, these are things that only God has given you and can give you.

Another thing I recomment is praising him day and night, go to church, and worship music is the best, regardless of what you think at the end God Jesus is the truth. One day I was in complete fear when the LORD touched my body and told me get up and fight pray out loud and worship my name I did this for about an hour. After a week of extreme fear the LORD made me feel I had to attend an all night church event, I worshiped and prayed the whole way there. God told me I will give you something. Barely being able to get up because at this point I had not eaten for about 3 weeks I went to church and barely praying God Holy Spirit touched me and I fell to the floor and for two days I felt his precense heavely.

Then one night after this event I knew God Holy Spirit wanted to baptize me in tongues but I was afraid then one night I told the Holy Spirit I am not afraid anymore and immediately I was speaking in a heavenly language for about two hours and then I ended with a heavenly song. Everyday I would do this up until now.

It is a great gift, people do not listen to people who say tongues are of the devil, why would he need tongues if he understands all languages. I feel a closer connection praying to God everyday and I glorify the name of Jesus and I no longer have that hopeless depression and this Monday Jesus came in my sleep and told me daughter you are healed it is time to work.

Now I started as part of a worship team, and feel like a completely different person. I no longer have long fights with my familily and boyfriend and know that I have a purpose here on Earth and that I am no accident in this universe and so are you. My goal is to intercede for the saints if you need prayer let me know and I will add you to my list and agree with you in the name of Jesus. We are in a battlefield and we will not rest until we go home. We Christians have to stick together the LORD is not that far away.

He is also working to renew my family and even my brother had a vision about the rapture. Christians who believe in the resurection of Jesus Christ and in the Holy and Divine Trinity must stand together and not let small legalistic issues make them critical about one another. Instead of us criticizing a falling brother pray pray pray for them, pray for pastors, evangelist, families, and for the justice of God to prevail. love you all in the name of Jesus Christ our Lord and Savior and owe everything to him today.

I cannot get up in front of people and speak, I am one of those people who do good only in crowds of one or two…I say these words to
the church, the body of Christ…to edify Jesus and not to condemn but to set free…I was born again September 23, 1977 @9:15 at night..just before I went
to church I told the one who invited me “I will go to church once and once only!! I will go to a church of my choice and one thing I will never do is give
up my booze”…I didn’t say those things in a very nice way but for some reason it didn’t scare or intimidate the one who was witnessing to me…well we
went to church of my choice..and I thank god that the church was a spirit filled Pentecostal church. A church that did not baby step or water down the
word of all mighty god…at the end of the service I raised my hand to be saved.. I’m so glad the pastor didn’t ask for an alter call because as I said I’m
a little shy..but god saw my hand go up…the next day I told the one who had gone to church with me that I had been born again and delivered from
alcohol..they said a feather would have knocked them over…

Here I’m going to jump forward many years.. A lot happened but I’ll skip it for now…in 2006 our area had a new building opening…it was tioga downs a casino only 20 minutes from home…I had drifted away from god and could not hardly wait for the place to open…up to this point I had not gambled and no desire to do so…..I started to go once a week and then twice a week and then whenever i could get there… After a couple years i started to
steal..no i didn’t go into someone’s pocketbook and take their money…I opened credit cards in my mother’s name and took cash advances to gamble with..her
mail came to my house and I made the credit card payments so it was easy…she didn’t know and she trusted me to pay her bills and do right by her finances…I
began to let my bills slide but paid hers until I didn’t even pay hers because there were so many I just simply couldn’t keep up with them all..one month I
lost her car payment money at the casino and the finance company called her to say the car payment was late..I told her not to worry I had forgotten and would mail it out..she called me again and said they wanted the payment that day…now I was getting scared..I had lost hundreds of her money and my own
at  the casino…I asked her to loan the money to me and I would pay her when I got paid..she went to the bank and  she asked for a print out of her checking
account and found a list of tioga downs… Tioga downs… Tioga downs withdrawals..keep in mind I had been handling my mother’s finances for almost
10 years…she got in her car , came to my house and confronted me…I took her outside and told her a had a gambling problem..I’m sure she was shocked..but
more than that she didn’t understand the power of my addiction…and either did I..but I knew I was  in a lot of trouble with her and the law!!

My mother took her finances back and began to unravel the mess I had created..I cried and cried in disbelief of how I had used my mother
and lied to my mother and lied to cover up this addiction…she still doesn’t know I gambled away  10s of thousands of dollars  in a few short years…

You know what day it was when my mother found out I had beenstealing from her? It was September 23–the anniversary of when I was born
again…I just couldn’t get to church fast enough and pray hard enough for god to get me through this mess I was in…but did I stop gambling …no I did
not…because I could not..after all it was the only fun thing I did..the only place I could escape my problems and only place I didn’t have to think about god and how far away I had drifted…

All at the same time I became disabled and lost my car..my income went down almost $1000 a month… And this is where my story gets better..

I had no car, very little money and still went to the casino. .I just took less money and found rides …I prayed for god to help me but I would still shake when I thought of going to the casino and when I couldn’t get there…I was hooked…Satan had used the casino to destroy me…

Since I was home a lot more I spent a lot of time on the computer and one day I typed in Jimmy Swaggart…there he was on the Internet 24 hours a day..I listened every day about the cross the cross the cross and one day I woke up knowing that I had been delivered…completely– divinely–miraculously– totally delivered..how do I know? I know the power of deliverance from being delivered from alcohol many years ago…I knew that I knew  and I would never doubt it..It was finished…I cry  now when I think of how I was delivered..

I want to share this with you to let you know the answer is not in will power–possessive thinking–self help books–counseling–therapy–good works or trying to do good things..the answer is in Jesus Christ..the cross…what the cross represents..the act of Jesus dying and raising up again and send ing his holy spirit..

The casino is no place for a child of god…not to gamble…not to eat at the buffet—not to meet friends or go see a concert…It is an unholy place and Satan will use it against you..

I’ve used all the reasoning and excuses…It’s just fun…the food is good..they give me free food..the entertainment is great..I have friends there…but I am telling you Jesus Christ is not glorified..there is a bar there ..people are losing their livelihood..people use the name of our lord and savior as a curse word..people get drunk there…is this where he wants you to be..we are to be separate from the world…that isn’t just a little expression…being separate from the world is what god had told us to do in his word…

I pray that you understand that sin in our lives…any sin of any nature…. Will consume us unless we repent…the cross of Christ is the answer for everything in our life…

Don’t look to Jimmy Swaggart.. Your friends…your family…your church or your pastor..go to the cross and there you will be set free and be made whole…It is time for his people to get all the wicked ways out of our lives..he is coming back for a spotless bride and he is coming soon…look around..even the unsaved realize the world is upside down but we have the answer and we know the redeemer…pray and look into your heart and put Jesus first…maybe the things in your life that are not pleasing to Christ are subtle and maybe they are a secret…maybe you think there are little and big sins…but god sees our lives and hearts…look and see what god sees…

The next time you come to church bring someone who doesn’t know Jesus as their personal savior.. .Its time for the church to claim back what has been stolen..It’s time for revival…don’t let the little things creep in and get to be big things and issues..the alter is there for seeking god and his will…use it every time the doors of the church are open…..pay without ceasing…..this is the will of god..support  your church with your tithes and be used of god…tell everyone the good news …

Today I praise god for salvation,  deliverance and his grace…amen..god loves you…yes he really does!

My Journey Into Hell
by
Norman A. Sims

I clearly remember back in 1966 when I was 8 years old, long before I knew anything about the Bible, the Lord’s Plan of Salvation for mankind and how He defeated Satan on the cross over 2,000 years ago I was suddenly taken into hell without warning. I cannot say for certain if I was in or out of the body but I knew without being told I was in hell. Nobody ever told me about the afterlife nor during that time have I ever viewed a deceased person until 2 years later. I did not see the Lord nor did I hear Him speak to me although I knew there was a God and a devil but I did not fully understand nor was I aware of the warfare taking place daily between Christ and Satan. When I was taken into hell I immediately knew that I was in hell without being told and I also knew the people I heard screaming had died and did some bad things before they died and went there. I was suddenly dropped into hell inside a protective cubicle I believe was made of pure gold that was transparent just like it is written in the Bible. After I was dropped into hell while sitting in the center of the cubicle I saw flames miles high unlike on earth. The flames were so intense that the pressure from the heat of those flames caused the cubicle I was in to bulge slightly. As the Bible says it is like being in a furnace. Those flames roar very loud as if being in a furnace but many times louder than a furnace. The screams of the lost souls could be heard from all around and constant. Slightly below the cubicle I was in I saw the dark shadow of a woman in the flames constantly screaming with her face towards the sky in extreme agony.

The cries and screams of the lost souls in torment is awful beyond belief and unforgettable. I cannot describe it in mere words except to say if you could hear those screams it would go through your whole being and terrify you. Those screams alone will stay with you forever in your memory. I did not see any demons nor other parts of hell nor did I see any kinds of torments inflicted on the lost souls. The only thing I clearly saw and heard was the awful flames and the constant screaming of the lost souls in hell. I clearly heard the screams of the lost souls down in the flames but I could not see them except for the woman slightly below the cubicle I was in. As suddenly as I was taken into hell I was suddenly taken out of hell and found myself awake on the cot I was sleeping on. I was shaken up and thought I was being punished for something I did so I asked: “God, what did I do?” But no answer ever came.

It was many years later did I come to realize that the Lord wanted me to know about hell and the reality of it at an early age and neither I nor anyone else had to go there. I also realized why Jesus is oftentimes referred to as The Savior. Many do not realize the significance as to why He died and shed His precious blood on the Cross of Calvary for the remission of our sins and what He is saving us from. It is not written for nothing that all must call on the Lord Jesus Christ and repent now before it’s too late. I can tell you firsthand that hell is very real because I’ve seen some of it and it’s no joke or a laughing matter. Just the screams of the lost souls and the intense flames alone is enough to terrify you like nothing on earth. Although I was a casual visitor in hell within a protective cubicle I was terrified like nothing on earth. The second time I was shown hell was in 2003. While lying across my bed relaxing before I went to work I suddenly saw a panoramic screen come at me and suddenly I was taken up in the vision. I wasn’t in a protective cubicle this time but I was taken through an area of hell very fast.

The area of hell I was taken through was extremely dark and cavernous. Straight ahead I saw flames coming out of a wide pit that reached as high as a 3-story apartment building. I saw several dark figures being thrown into that pit by unseen hands. I was pulled towards that pit as if being pulled by a giant magnet. While being pulled towards that pit I felt myself being squeezed by a person to the right and left of me as if being packed like sardines in a can. I felt myself naked and I also felt powdery dirt on the ground and heard the pleas and cries of thousands of lost souls in the darkness crying: “O, Jesus please save us, O, Jesus please save us!” As I got closer to the pit I began to feel the heat from that pit and the stench of death and afterwords I suddenly came out of the vision as suddenly as I was taken into the vision. Upon leaving for work afterwords I heard a voice inside my head saying: “Now get up and go to work.” I got up and went to work as I normally did and did not relate this story to a few persons until a week later.

Well if should start somewhere, I should start in 2005, my cousin Jennifer was diagnosed with cancer. So in my innocence, not able to comprehend cancer, I prayed that she would get better. But it was terminal cancer. So in a few months she had gone to chemotherapy and had looked like she was getting better. So she decided to go and do things she wanted to do in life with her mum Kate.

But on the 9th of December, wile me and my mum were putting up the Christmas tree, little did i know Jennifer had taken sick that day and then just as we had finished, my dad phoned and asked to speak to my mum. When she had finished talking she sat me down. The tone of her voice was nothing like i’d ever heard, she told me what my dad phoned for. Jennifer had passed away.

In a state of shock and sadness, I began to weep, thinking why her. I didnt attend school for a few days, I was only 11 at the time. So on the 12th of December, I attended her funeral, still crying, but I had a sense of anger and anguish towards God as I thought he was supposed to help her get better. When the mass ended my mum took me out for lunch while i saw my classmates go into practice for the carol service. But the thought never left my mind.

So now we come to 2010, August 29th, I was on holiday with my mum, Aunt, Granny and Granda. We were having a good time but i had a though, I haven’t talked to my dad in a while I’ll give him a ring when i get back.  Well he tried ringing me but I didnt get to answer cause I didnt know. (Little did I know this would be a thing i’d regret in the future)

Well i got home and school was cloing in so i got ready and I was buzzing to go back. It was Wednesday 1st September 2010, I had come home from  school and had been relaxing on the sofa. Well then there was a rap on the door, 2 men were standing there. I didnt know at the time they were my uncle and cousin but they wished to speak to my mum alone.

Later in the day after dinner. My mum asked to speak to me. She sat me down and started to speak in that dreaded tone her words were “I have some bad news.” I had a confused look on my face but she continued. “Its about your daddy.” Like a sword in the heart and with no time to spare i broke down in tears, i couldnt believe what i was hearing, it couldnt be true.

But it was. I questioned God’s existence then when people told me it was all part of his plan i felt like taking a knife to my chest and tearing my heart out. I stopped believing in god. During my Fathers funeral, i said one of the readings. It had been picked by my Aunt Kate, and i could barely keep calm enough to say it. But it was a Beautiful sendoff. For me lifting his coffin was challenging as my heart just couldnt take it. But with my friends, family and my dad’s friends i felt more calm.

Months later when i went to the grave. The stone there said upon it my fathers name. Reality hit me, I’m one of the few whos lives are effected by this. None cares, life goes on. I start to talk to the stone, hoping i wasnt going insane. I stopped believing in God thinking I had been let down so I felt i was alone.

Well I have changed and it was all thanks to my friends especially Alanna, My mum and Youth Initiatives more Formally the Best project. I have all you people to thank. Alex you never lost faith, in that id be able to regain mine. Thank you. Michi thank you for having conversations about religion with me, although i may have been arguing alot i was looking for an answer. To Terrance thank you for listening to what i had to say, and helping me understand, even if i had only been talking to for a bit thank you..  And everyone who helped me and for anyone who prayed for me ever.

I smile like i used to now. thank you.