Testimony Share

CAUTION: This blog contains truth about the sex industry. If you are age 17 or under, please get permission from your parents. Although, statistics show the largest entry age into the sex industry is 12-17 .

Getting an AIDS test was never easy for me, because I was always afraid that my past could sneak up on me at anytime.

Back in 1992, things were different then they are today. I would wait up to two weeks to get my results, and they were always the longest two weeks of my life. When I would get that phone call from the nurse, my heart would skip a beat, as I dreaded the possibility that I was about to receive a death sentence. All of the tests came out negative. I was given the clean bill of health in 1992, and was told by my doctor that I no longer needed to be tested. I felt like God had given me a new chance at life, and I was very grateful for that.

So my life goes on. Steve and I get married and we have three children. I then formed a ministry beginning in the year 2001. So this is the happy ending, right? WRONG!

I received bad news when I went for a follow-up at my doctor’s office. By the time I received this news, it was 15 years later!

“You tested positive for Hepatitis C.” My heart sunk.

“What? That’s not possible!” I exclaimed. “I’ve been out of the sex industry for a long time. I was tested several times for several years after I left. I have had three children since then. Surely it would have been caught.”

“There was no test for Hepatitis C back in those days. It’s possible. I’m sorry, but you are going to have to give more blood work.” He put the fear of God in me. “There is also a strong possibility that you may have AIDS. Many people who have hepatitis C have AIDS.”

“How could this have happened?” I silently asked.

“Did you ever use needles?”

“No.”

“Have a blood transfusion?”

“No.”

“Have you ever had a tattoo?”

“No.”

“Well, it’s mostly caught by blood to blood, but it’s possible it could have been caught while you were in the escort service.”

I was stunned and I wanted to remain frozen in my chair. A million thoughts went through my head, faster than I could process the information. How could this have happened while I was in the escort service? I was so careful about using condoms correctly. I wanted a family more than anything. Steve and I had been together for fourteen years and had been in a monogamous relationship, so I knew all too well where I must have caught it: from the escort industry.

What did this mean? For me? For Steve and my children? My Gosh, I thought. I breastfed for over two years, and there was blood in my breast milk. Spencer hates needles! What would this mean for my ministry? I just got done telling my audience at the prostitution conference that I was disease free. I received a round of applause. How could I possibly continue my ministry?

I was escorted down the hall to give three vials of blood. I was told that the second set of blood work would tell me whether I just had the antibodies or actually had Hepatitis C. By the way the staff was treating me, however, I felt like my infection was already confirmed. Counting the next three, this made eight vials I had given in a period of two weeks. I noticed that the nurse put on extra thick gloves. Right before the nurse injected the needle, I felt myself swallow as the reality hit. My life would never be the same again.

My two week wait was a nightmare. Every minute of every day, I had wondered whether or not I was safe. Steve started getting paranoid about catching it, and I started to feel like an outcast in the family. I started doing some of my own research about Hepatitis C and learned that Hepatitis C is usually not spread through sexual relations. However, according to the AIM Medical Healthcare Foundation, the efficacy of using latex condoms in preventing Hepatitis C is still unknown, and now, I, like others, had become just another statistic. I wondered how many others, like me, faced the lies of the sex industry and the consequences of their decisions many years later.

The littlest things began to frighten me. For instance, when I would have my period, a sudden chill would come over me as I thought, Did I remember to wash the towel? Was there blood on the soap? Then, one day, I caught Spencer using my tooth brush, and I rushed to him yelling, “Why are you doing that? Don’t ever touch my tooth brush again! Never!”

Spencer just stood there with a look of fear. I felt horrible, but my only goal was to protect him.

Later that night, I tucked my four-year-old son Spencer into bed and kneeled at his bedside. I softly ran my fingers through his dirty blond hair until he fell asleep. “Please, Lord, please… if nothing else,” I whispered, “please let Spencer be okay. I deserve to have it, but he doesn’t.

The sound of my prayer woke up Spencer. “Mom? Why are you crying?” Holding my tears back, I replied, “Because you’re so beautiful, and mommy loves you.”

“Do you want my bear?” he asked.

“No, honey, you keep your bear. Mommy will be okay.” I remained at his bedside until he fell asleep again. I then went into my bedroom and prayed, crying in frustrated desperation, “Why, God? Why! Why now? Why after all these years? Why didn’t this show up then? Tell me why, God? Haven’t I done Your will? Isn’t this ministry what You want? How do You expect me to run this ministry if I’m sick! Answer me! Why are You so quiet. Why, God? Why?” I was as broken as a person could be. In the next moment, I realized that perhaps the reason the Hepatitis C was never caught was that God didn’t want me to know at any other time in my life. Would I have been as strong? Probably not. Yet, at that moment, I wasn’t sure that I could be strong any longer. I was angry, but deep inside I knew the truth. No where in the Bible does it state that God causes everything to work out to have a happy ending on earth. We are the ones that cause the mistakes. God gave us an instruction book to try to prevent those mistakes in the first place.

It seemed like an eternity before the test results were complete. I received a phone call before I drove down to the office. The nurse told me that they had accidentally sent my blood work to the lab unfrozen, causing it to be rejected. When asked if I would come back in to give another three vials, I said, “No. I’m finding another doctor.” Slamming the phone down, I told Steve, “I cannot believe they messed up like that! I cannot believe I have to wait yet another umpteen weeks!”

A month later, the second doctor confirmed that the first set of work showed that I was positive for Hepatitis C. He refused to do a second set of blood work. Instead, he referred me to a gastrology specialist.

By the time Thanksgiving had come, I had endured almost six weeks of uncertainty as the gastrologist could not get me in for an appointment until the second week of December. All my relatives were so happy to see each other. All I wanted to be was a bucket of tears. I had no inclination to be happy or shake anyone’s hand. I saw no point in pretending.

When the day finally arrived for my second phase of testing at the gastrologist’s office, the nurse put the fear of God in me. “If your second set confirms that you are active, realize what this means. You could need a liver biopsy and end up having to take shots three times per week.” She then handed me a brochure that told me all about injections that, in my opinion, would make me sicker. As I was escorted down the hall to give my blood, the lab nurse looked at me and asked, “Are you okay?”

I told her I was fine, but the truth was I was far from fine. I had gone almost two months wondering if I was infected with Hepatitis C, and I had been concerned for my future and for my husband and children. I had been treated like an outcast. I didn’t even know if my ministry would flourish, and the nurse practitioner had just put the fear of God in me. How could I possibly be fine, lady?

I had to wait another two weeks, and I didn’t even feel like celebrating Christmas. I had started to wonder if it would be better not to know the results at all.

On December 27^th, I finally got my chance to learn my results, over two months after I was first diagnosed. As I waited in a private room to learn the truth, I prayed, “God, you’ve brought me this far. Whatever happens, I promise You, Lord, that I will continue this ministry. I promise You, I will fight for Your men and women who You want to come home. I will educate the world about the dangers of the sex industry. Whatever Your will, I’m going to fight this fight. Everything I do with my ministry is for You.”

The nurse came in and briefly introduced herself. “Hi, I have the results. It shows HIV–negative, Hepatitis B-negative and Hepatitis A–negative.”

“That’s good, but what about the Hepatitis C?” I said with concern.

She fumbled through my records. “Hmm. It’s not here. I’m not sure why. They should have been back by now. I’ll have to call the lab.”

I became furious. I prayed again, “God? If she has lost the results then I’ve had it! No more, God! I don’t care to find out the results. I’m through. Then it must be Your will that I don’t know.”

Twenty minutes felt like an hour. Upon her return, she walked in with a smile and said, “Congratulations! Your body fought the virus off. It appears you only had the antibodies. Less than twenty percent are that lucky. You are very, very lucky!”

Here I am, in December of 2007. I have had a second blood test to confirm that I am okay, and that I do not have the virus. Many people have sent discouraging emails to me saying, “You could still have it.” Let me tell you a little something about myself; that still won’t stop me from the mission God has laid out before me! It will only make me more motivated.

I don’t feel that I was lucky. I was blessed. The truth about using an escort is horrifying. Before I began my journey in the escort industry, I was told several times by my “madam” and “stepfather” that as long as I used a condom, I would be safe. I was told that an escort was considered high class and that only those working the streets got diseases. Because I was sleeping with more upscale, professional men, I was supposed to be safe. That was the biggest deception of all time. During my journey, I had used condoms, and I still caught Chlamydia and Crabs and was exposed to Hepatitis C. Some of my friends who have been sexually promiscuous caught genital warts and Herpes. THE TRUTH: is that it doesn’t matter if the person is rich or poor or what walk of life they came from. We are all susceptible to getting an STD, no matter what protection we use, as long as we do not obey God’s law. There is no such thing as “safe sex.” The truth is that condoms do not offer protection for diseases that are transmitted by skin to skin contact such as human papilloma virus and herpes simplex virus. Condoms are “safer” sex, but they are NOT safe sex!! No degree of condom education will curb the transmission of these organisms.

Listen to me, because this information can SAVE your life. I never thought in a million years that anything would EVER turn up positive, especially after I was tested many, many times after leaving the escort industry.

God already tells us us that “none of us know when we might fall victim to a sudden disaster and find ourselves like fish in a net or birds in a trap”. (Ecclesiastes 9:12)

I know other people who have fallen into the trap just like me. I get the emails. Trust me. If it can happen to us, it can happen to you to.

Are we really in control of our destinies? Will there ever be a day when we, as a society, will come to take God’s word more seriously? Or will we continue to leave the instruction book on the shelf to collect dust? When do we draw the line?

You read in the beginning of my story about how my stepfather made me a prostitute. I don’t know how your earthly father or stepfather was, but today, many of us struggle with a Heavenly Father because our earthly fathers did a bad job. But if I can experience physical abuse from my father, and sexual abuse from my stepfather, and if I can relate to God as my Heavenly Father, and if I can change - then so can you!

Now that you’ve read my story, please don’t delay in saying this prayer and contact me so we can keep in touch!

Heavenly Father,

I am so sorry I messed things up. Forgive me and help me out of this pit. I acknowledge my sin to you. I don’t want to cover it up. I’m tired of everything. Come into my heart and turn this darkness into light. I believe your son died on the cross. Clean up my mess and put to death anything that belongs to my own earthly desires and give me a whole new outlook. Help me along this journey. Thank you for forgiving me. Thank you for loving me just as I am. Amen.

The first time I did this was back in 1990 in a jail cell after never having known real affection from an earthly father. And when I got down on my hands and knees in that jail cell that night, it transformed my life. I’ve had a lot of regrets in my life, but accepting Jesus has been the one open adoption I have never regretted.

(c) Susan Stafford. www.susanstafford.com

To edify, to admonish, to strengthen the brethren. My Testimony.This God that we serve is a consuming fire. My pen is far from that of a ready writer. Because I really don’t know where to start from. So I release myself to the Holy Spirit of the living God. That same Spirit that raised up Christ from the dead…that quickens my mortal body….

It all started the day that old liar said I would not live through the birth of my second child. The born again child of God that I was (and am) I just said impossible. Can’t happen. Day after day, I found myself terribly depressed. By my thirty-seventh week of pregnancy, I was down and out, crying constantly. Little did I know I was about to be launched into the third phase of my life and that the birthing would be the most challenging experience I had ever had.

So I gave birth to him. It was the Lord’s doing and it was marvellous in my eyes. Taking care of this child was so unlike the first, I had not dwelt on the Word as I did the first time so I found myself weak all the time. Always emotionally out. I had lost it but did not know it.

One Saturday morning I was in the bathroom when I noticed a small painful lump in my breast.  I just mumbled a prayer and went my way. It grew bigger and bigger. A week later I was at the hospital where I was told I had an abscess that would require incision and drainage. The procedure was carried out. Weeks before this I had taken antibiotics continuously for consistent breast pain. After the procedure, I was given antibiotics one of which I was terribly allergic to. That night, I saw my Lord Jesus, he reached out His hand to me and took something from the affected breast and receded from my sight. I was relieved.

As the days wore on, I didn’t seem to get better. Thus started the trip to the hospital. By the time the doctors found out what was the matter with me, I was dehydrated and was put on drip. I was told there were two other abscess points filled with puss that was affecting me and causing strange symptoms such as burning up inside, dizziness, faintness, lack of appetite….I was placed on drip immediately and the operation was later carried out to rid me of the puss.

When I got home after a week in the hospital, I was happy to see my children again. Four days later I had a strange attack. I was terribly fatigued, in-coherent, and faint. Then one evening, I could not breathe properly! As such attacks became more frequent we decided to go back to the doctors. Thus the tests began. One after the other, they revealed nothing. The heart test, the lungs, thyroid tests….. I was certified healthy.

The only thing the doctor could advice was that I take more iron tablets as earlier tests had shown some form of deficiency in my iron levels. I began taking the medication. By now I was despondent.

It was a rude awakening when the doctors said they could find nothing wrong with me. Thus began the battle of the mind. Could it be my mind? That I could not breathe? That i had terrible palpitations? That I felt as though I was losing my mind?

By now I began delving into the Word. I had been away from church for months. I went back to church and began searching the scriptures for healing Word. By now I knew the only solution was Jesus. Only He could heal me. I did not even quite know what the matter was. I could not explain the symptoms anymore. But so deep was I in the Word that I Knew I was healed.

The day the breathing problem started, I bought as many faith books and tapes I could afford then and built them up consistently over the next weeks. Each day I would walk by faith in God’s Word that himself took my infirmities and bore my sicknesses and that by His stripes I am healed. I would SPEAK the WORD constantly with faith in my heart. Every opportunity, in my car, doing house chores, I had a Word tape playing to my hearing.

God said to me that I need not say all of it, cos I learnt that you MUST confess the Word to have a manifestation of it. One scripture on healing had enough power for me. It has been a road where God has had to baptise me with his sufficient grace.

I came to understand Him as I had never known Him in all these 16 years of salvation. I came to know the power in His Word (the Living Word, the Spoken Word), the true meaning of the Holy Communion and the need for constant communion with Him. 

The weeks turned into months and new symptoms sought to be manifest. I kept at the Word. It seemed it was when I prayed more that it was worse. Then there was that scent….. I started perceiving it the period the breathing challenge began. At first I wondered about it. I noticed it was so strong whenever I was praying, worshipping or at Church. The peace I had made me realise it has been God,” decending  from the Mountain of Spices” as the Word says, to re-assure me of His continued presence in me and about me.

As the months increased, and the discomfort continued, I wondered if my faith was not “working” cos I has believed completely and had received my healing which was settled thousands of years ago at the cross and at the Resurrection of Jesus where I was raised with Him. Should I return to the hospitals? Am I causing myself all this pain? Fear tried to grip and overwhelm? Would my life ever be the same again? I Would cast down these imaginations and focus on the Word. Even at points of absolute exhaustion, panting, almost fainting, I would carry on with my extremely busy day, knowing that He is the Strength of my life and that His grace is abundant unto me. And my outward appearance was better than ever…..

 What I have learnt is what I call stubborn faith. It was the Fight of Faith. We must be resilient in receiving and speaking our God’s Word. Because they are ye and amen.   If it seems like you aren’t getting any better, it is all a lie. We have been healed a long time ago. It was completed at resurrection. When the symptoms come and try to pull you down, speak the word, when it seems like fear wants to envelope you, speak the Word..we are no longer in bondage to the spirit of fear, but He has given us the Spirit of Power of Love and of a sound mind. Again, I came to realise more that ever that I am a Spirit and that my body is a Tabernacle to be taken care of by me to house my real self. That it is through God’s word and fellowship with Him that I can grow my real self-the Spirit man. A careful study of Genesis 1 and 2 revealed this. He made me like Himself in Genesis 1 and formed my body in Genesis 2 after which he breathe my life (spirit) into me. This goes for every man walking on earth. To be born again is to receive Jesus Christ and come alive in your Spirit man. It is the only way to make eternity and to live a victorious life.

When it appears better then all of a sudden it seems worse, ignore the feelings. They are not the truth. The truth is what God says. You are healed; He came that you may have life and have it MORE abundantly.

When your mind is assaulted and the devil tries to fill it with all manner of lies, telling you that you will never be well or that you will die or that the Most High has forsaken you, say aloud that it is a lie because He said: I will that you prosper and be in health even as your soul prospers; that with long life will I satisfy you and show you my salvation; that I will never leave you nor forsake you. Believe only what His Word says about you and ask for grace not to focus on the lying symptoms.

Manifestation of healing may be instant. More often it is gradual. Don’t try to understand it. Trust in the Lord with all your hearts and lean not on your own understanding,  in all your ways acknowledge Him and He will direct your path. There were times I was in great discomfort and still shared messages on healing with so many others. I decided I would stand on His Word till my last breathe. It could and would never fail. He is the Living Word. Jesus came and dwelt among us: He is God’s Word, manifested in the flesh, crucified, resurrected, and to return.   

Our Lord is more than able to see us through. Make up your mind,  that you will stand on His Word regardless of how hard it may seem. Just remember to speak the Word in faith. He says, when you walk thought the waters, it will not sweep over you , when you walk through the fire it will not burn you-the flames will not set you ablaze…… He lives in us, He moves in us.

Our lives are hid in Christ and Christ in God. Be at peace. His peace that transcends all understanding will be with us always.

His Word is better and more effective than any prescription or medication. This is not to say don’t use medication or live a healthy lifestyle; it is by revelation or experience that we as believers know when it’s time to claim our healing based on the promises in His Word.

 Again, no matter the diagnosis, known or unknown, stay in faith in His Word. No matter how long it takes, it has never failed.

Folashade Adeloye

Nigeria

My name is Pete. I had leukemia when I was a child. The doctors said I had little hope of survival. I had several chemotherapy and radiation treatments. I know Jesus was with me through it all because now I am 27 years old and I have been considered cured for over 22 years now.  He is the Great Physician!  I praise his holy name and thank him everyday for what he has done in my life and the blessings he has given me. Even though some people may think there is no hope in some situations, with Jesus, there is always hope and healing. Jesus can help anyone through anything, as long as you pray to him to help you and keep the faith. When your down to nothing, God and Jesus are up to something in your life. I pray that this will touch someones life to know Jesus is the all mighty powerfull healer.  Thank you and God bless.  

- I’ve updated my testimonies from ‘My Life Walking With God With Dreams and Visions’ and added it here with a new title… God has been doing great things now in these last days. He is searching for people who are willing to answer His great calling. In Isaiah 6:8, God said, “Whom shall I send? And who will go for us?” And I said, “Here am I. Send me! -

Shalom!

Hi, i’m Candy Rosette from Malaysia. Before I go further here, I give you a glimpse about how God had brought me through this incredible journey with Him. It all started through the desires of my parents’ hearts that one day, one or all of their children will serve the Lord when they grow up. When my brother was born in 1980, my parents named him, Evangeliss. He was dedicated to the Lord in the Church. Then, after 6 years, my sister, Grace, was born. Eventually, when I was born in 1989, my parents gave me the name, Candy Rosette. My parents never gave up praying for all of us even before we were formed in our mother’s womb. After years of committing us into prayers to God, nothing happened to my brother nor my sister. However, God had chosen me apart from my brother and sister to serve Him in ministry. Growing up in a Christian family, we’ve experienced all kinds of challenges and hardships through trials and testings. Either in finances, health issues, spiritual warfares, or jobs. Eventhough the truths about God had instilled into my life from the time I was born, I never apply them seriously. Nevertheless, God had already begun to do something in my life at the age of 11 through a dream which I could recall even till now. From then on, God began speaking to me through dreams and visions.

However, I only knew the reason why I have all this visions and dreams when I was 16 years old. One night, He spoke to me when I sat at my study table and He told me to take my Bible. I knew He wanted me to read something. So I say, “God at least show me the word -VISION- or -DREAM-”. Then the moment when I opened my Bible, this word just shone out as if it was the only word in there. Can you imagine what I saw? “VISION”! I was so shocked because He showed that word to me and that was my first time asking God to reveal something to me in the Bible. (Isaiah 29:7) I read that verse and I noticed that there was another word -DREAM- in that verse…

First of all, on 5th September 2000, God gave me this shocking dream. At first, I did not realize that it had something to do with the end-time happenings. In the dream, I was together with a group of people somewhere in an open field not far from a big city. Many of them were drinking and having fun together. By the way, it was around midnight; they were still enjoying themselves partying. All of a sudden, I heard a loud sound and it went louder and louder. Suddenly the people around me disappeared and I stood there all alone. I was terrified! I turned to my right to see where the sound came from and to my utter shock, I saw a big plane flying very low in full speed with one of its engine on fire and smoke was coming out from behind it. It flew across the field and headed straight into the city. Then, it crashed right into the high buildings. It was a horrible scene. The city was on fire and I could see smoke rising so high. I could not believe what I saw because it happened so fast! The bushes were on fire too and I saw buildings collapse right before my eyes. Furthermore, I saw bombs raining down from the sky towards the city. The sky was bloody red and chaos was all around me. Suddenly, I found myself standing right in the middle of the city. It was very dusty and I saw debris and papers all around on the ground. I could not see anybody but I heard guns shooting and explosions all around me. Sometimes the sound faded and there was complete silence. I noticed that there were army tankers in the middle of the road. I felt so alone but I braved myself to walk along the five-foot way. While I was walking, I realized that someone was walking with me. I could not see him but he was talking to me at the same time. We walked pass a street with posters of famous Hollywood artists and actors. I saw the poster of Britney Spears, Elton John, and many more…

I woke up from the dream, not realizing that God was trying to tell me something. I drew the whole scene on a piece of paper so that I will not forget what I dreamt. A year passed and it really happened. On September 11, 2001, the dream became real. I was speechless when I saw the news in the television. Before the attack on September 11, I have never seen nor heard about the twin towers in New York. Ever since the night when God gave me that dream, God began to show me more revelations. Even so, I was still not very close with the Lord.

A few years later, I had another dream of whether to choose “life or death”. In my dream, I was drowning in a river somewhere deep in a forest. It was a horrible experience because I could not swim. My leg was stuck between a log or something. I was screaming for help and shouting desperately will all my might and strength. I shouted for my parents, brother, sister, friends, relatives and other people but no one was around. I was so scared and almost gave up because I could hardly breathe. A few times, I almost fainted and I thought I was going to die. Somehow, deep inside I had a feeling that I had not called someone…His name was “JESUS“. Before I almost breathed my last breath, I called out to Him and He saved me. Immediately after I called His name, I woke up from the dream. That was so real to me. I felt that HE lifted me out from the deep waters. This dream was just like what was in the Bible (Psalm 69:1-3 and 13-36). Please read Romans 8 also.

I was spiritually born-again when I was 14 years old. Broken before the Lord, I rededicated my whole life to Him. That was in the year 2003. I was baptised the following year on Easter Sunday but I didn’t understand much about it because I was quite young in my Christian faith. A week later after I was baptised, I had a wonderful vision when I went to the Church for the Sunday Service. During the prayer session, I had a vision of a beautiful white dove. Here was what happened; after the sermon, the pastor started to pray and I bowed down my head and prayed too. At that instant, I saw brightness as I closed my eyes. Normally when we close our eyes, we will see nothing but darkness. Well, I didn’t know what was happening to me at that particular moment. When I looked beyond the brightness, I saw something flying towards me. It started with a tiny dot but as it flew closer and closer to me, I saw a beautiful white dove. It was ‘whiter than white’ and so beautiful. I could hardly believe what I saw. I opened my eyes for a while but the picture of the dove was so clear before my eyes! I closed my eyes again and it flew towards me. I could feel the wind brushing over my face. No one knew what was happening to me, neither did I.

In March 2005, before my first exam in high school, I was so worried, stressful, depressed and afraid. Usually, everyday, I would pray and read the word of God but on that day, I didn’t. I didn’t call upon the name of the Lord. I’ve forgotten Him but He remembered me. I went to bed early that night and I didn’t switch off the light. In the middle of the night, I was having a dream and in the dream, I heard someone knocking at my balcony door. It was a light and gentle knock. Once in every 15-30 seconds. I ignored the first few knocks. Finally, I got up and went out to see what was outside. As I went outside my balcony, I saw a white old robe on the roof of my neighbour’s house as if someone had thrown it there. I felt weird so I thought of going back into my room knowing that no one was outside. (It was a cool, quiet, and dark morning. Only the light from my room shone out onto my balcony) Just as I turned back, I was shocked to see Jesus in front of me.

Instantly I knew who He was. I could see the scar in his hand and feet. He was dressed in a white robe with the red mantle around his shoulder. He stretched out His arms towards me. I was speechless and I didn’t know what to say. Then Jesus stretched His right hand towards me and I held onto His hand tightly. His tender touch flow into my body. I could feel the peace and comfort when I saw Him and especially to hold on to His hand. He told me; “It is your time,…GO IN PEACE”. After He mentioned that, I felt completely relieved from all my burdens. Then I felt my spirit flying into the air (I saw myself flying into the air!) The tears of joy flowed down my eyes. Later on, I could not remember what happened to me, until I woke up. This was a reminder to us that Jesus IS alive and He wants to help us in our life. He loves us even though we have not been close to Him. He is always waiting…and He is real… (Call unto Him and He will answer you!)–Jeremiah 33:3.

November 2005, a speaker came from Germany to Bintulu, Malaysia (my hometown). I did not know much about the anointing, healings, miracles, Holy Spirit, etc. My parents brought me to the S.I.B church here to listen to the sermon. Besides that, I was a bit stubborn at that time because I did not really like to go for the service. You know, giving all sorts of excuses (that was me LAST TIME). However, I heard a still small voice within me, saying that I should go and it was going to be my “special day”. Reluctantly, I went there. During the first praise and worship, I cried and I was so touched. I’ve never sang like that before. The pastor shared his sermon and later on there was another praise and worship time. This time I felt a bit different. While they were singing, I started confessing my sins and kept on asking God to come and fill me with His anointing. Suddenly, I felt something coming through my body and I felt so peaceful. I was in tears and I asked God to heal my headache (I have severe sharp pain and headache since I was in primary school). I put my hand on my head and I felt the heat flowing down my head like a burning fire. My body felt so hot and I could feel my face turning hot, as if my face was burning. Then my body started shaking so badly until I could hardly say a word! I just didn’t know what was happening to me. We were in the aircond room but I was shaking badly and my body was so hot!

The presence of God was so powerful. It was like being shocked by electricity. By the way, how I wish I could ask someone to explain why I was like that. Later on, all of us sat down while the pastor was still sharing his sermon. As I sat down, still shaking because of the anointing, I felt a gentle wind around me. My Bible was opened at that time and when I felt the wind (just like a warm blanket) around me, it was as if He was trying to show me something. I saw the pages of my Bible flipping very fast but gentle and it ended in the book of Hebrews! (My sister saw the pages of my Bible flipping but she did not know what was happening). She told me maybe it was the wind from the airconditioner…but that was impossible! I read the book of Hebrews and this verse caught my attention: “Today, if you hear HIS voice, do not harden your hearts.” I gazed at that verse repeatedly, I turned to the next page, and I saw the same verse. Then, there were prayers for healings and a few of them were slain in the spirit. I didn’t go to the front because I didn’t know what was happening to me but I was healed from the pain!

After the sevice, I went back home still shaking because of the powerful anointing. My parents prayed for me and things started to change. I couldn’t sleep the whole night until three in the morning. I was reading my Bible (like never before) and just praying and praying and praying. Through out that month, I prayed at night, reading the Bible. (This was the month when I started asking God to show me the word vision and dream in the Bible) Until one night while I was weeping and praying, I found myself kneeling in front of God’s throne. I saw God sitting on the throne, dressed in a beautiful white garment and He had a crown on His head. It was too bright as if I was looking at the sun but I could only see the smile on His face. This happened for a few nights when I prayed in my room. One evening, while I was sitting at my study table in my room, praying, I saw a vision. I didn’t see this vision once but I saw it at least three to four times in November 2005. I saw myself (probably around 20+ years old) PREACHING on a platform in front of so many YOUTHS. At first, I was shocked to see myself in my vision because I was very matured and different even the way how I spoke was unbelievable.

In December, I went to Kota Kinabalu, Sabah, Malaysia for a holiday with my parents. Before we went for a trip to Mount Kinabalu, I prayed and thank God for the fine weather and especially for the beautiful sceneries that we were about to enjoy. I took a lot of pictures of the mountain and the plants. Then, God spoke to me while I was looking around at the Strawberry Garden. He told me to look up to the sky and I snapped a picture of the cloud. The picture was so beautiful but I didn’t know why He told me to snap it. I went to my father and showed the picture that I snapped. I told him that it looked like a Chinese wording (actually, I don’t really know how to read Chinese). To his amazement, he told me that it meant “FATHER”. In Chinese, we pronounce it, “Fu”. From the picture, our Heavenly Father IS reminding us of His presence wherever we are going.

While we were shopping at Centre Point, KK, my father bought a book by Pastor Benny Hinn, “Good Morning Holy Spirit”. I was deeply moved by the Holy Spirit when I read that book. After reading that book, I prayed so hard that God will bring Pastor Benny or someone like him to Malaysia. Eventually, by the end of December last year, an aunty (quite close to my parents) told my parents that she was inviting an evangelist from Perth to Bintulu. Besides, there would be a service for those who wants to be filled with the Holy Spirit, who needs healings, speaking in tongues etc! Praise the Lord! He answered my prayers!

Early in the year 2006, a year of revivals and miracles happened in my life and my hometown. Before and after the clock strikes at midnight on 1st January 2006, my family and I gathered around to pray. Deep in my spirit, I knew great things are going to happen starting from this year. One week after 1st January 2006, around 6:30 in the morning, I woke up. Just as I wanted to open my eyes, God gave me a vision. I saw a horrible volcano eruption. The lava were flowing so fast and the smoke were rising so high even those who were staying far away could see it. It was very dark and I saw people running and screaming for help. They did not know where to run. When I saw those people running, they looked like locals because of their dark skin. This vision lasted for only 30-40 seconds. Immediately after the vision, I asked God; “What are all this about?” He spoke to my heart and said that this will happen soon. Again, I asked where would this take place and He told me that the name of the place would start with a word ‘M’. It sounded like Mexico, Miami, Me-…Because of the questions popping in my mind; I asked Him what I should do. This was what God wanted us to do, “Pray especially for the souls in US and INDONESIA.”

On 21st January 2006, I went to the auntie’s house for the meeting conducted by the evangelist from Perth. I was so touched and were filled with the God’s anointing. Miraculously, after the meeting, I met a friend and I talked with her. I started sharing about my dreams and visions! (Before, I was a quiet girl and seldom talk because of my shyness) God opened my mouth and I told her most of my experiences I have with the Lord. That was God’s purpose. Ever since that night, my life was “TOTALLY TRANSFORMED“. Never in my life have I experienced God’s touch so powerful. Wonderful and awesome things started happening everyday! Signs in the sky! Salvations in my friend’s life! Healings! Praise the Lord.

Furthermore, God showed the sign of a cross in the sky on the 11th February. It was so huge and bright! Then three more crosses at the beach the following day! Amazingly, I saw an old rugged cross at the beach at the same day! I remembered during the third night when I went to the meeting for healings etc (by the evangelist from Perth)… I was anointed and suddenly I had a vision. In my vision, God brought me up to heaven. I was standing in front of the huge gate. It was opened wide and on the right side, I saw a long winding path. Then, when I looked to my left, I saw this marvelous, huge palace! I managed to see a bit because I was standing outside the heaven’s gate. After a few moments, I woke up from my vision. It was amazing to see what He showed to me.

12th February 2006 (Sunday) at New Life Church. Two speakers came from US. Around 11.00am +, we were still having the Praise & worship time and the entire congregation were so touched and moved. During the worship, I have a vision from the Lord. My tears were flowing down my face when I saw it. I saw a big massive crowd of angels (millions & millions of them) bowing down before the Lord singing praises to Him! Holy, Holy, Holy… In addition, God was standing high above the clouds. Then I noticed that I was among the angels and my friend was somewhere behind me. The view was so awesome. Then the Lord spoke to me in a loud and calm voice: “I am your Lord” for three times!

On 15th February 2006 (Wednesday), my friend came to my home & we had a prayer session around 4.00pm. During our prayers, God gave us words of knowledge. In the midst of our prayer, suddenly God gave us some more visions! They were both interesting and horrible. Firstly, I saw a clock in my vision & so, I mentioned the word ‘clock’ & the time was moving so fast! When I mentioned this thing, my friend also mentioned the same thing! At the same time! After that, I saw a very long scroll with someone writing on it. I did not really understand the meaning yet but God answered my question a few days later through another speaker who came from Taiwan with the other teams from US during a seminar. (It was found in Exodus 34:27-28 / John 21:25 / Habakkuk 2:1-3 / Exodus 17:13-14)

On the 17.2.06 (Friday night). We had a cell group meeting with the youths from New Life Church at the pastor’s wife home from New Life Church, Bintulu. There were two speakers joining us. They came along with the teams from US. One was a Taiwanese and the other from England. During the prayer time, I was praying with the sister from England with another friend. Then I heard God spoke to me. He told me to go over to someone else and pray for her. Then God told me to lay my hands on her. As soon as I did that, the girl fell down under the anointing of God. Through out the prayer session, many of them were slain in the Spirit.

During the Ladies Seminar here at Li Hua Hotel (18th February 2006); the US team were conducting the seminar. After the sharing, there was a prayer session. Here was what happened:

Around 9.20pm, I went to the toilet for a while and later on, I went upstairs to go back to the room. Before I entered the room, my body started shaking and it went even worse as I entered the room. I could hardly stand on my feet! The anointing was so strong and God’s presence was so powerful. I stood at the back while they were all busy praying but my heart was itching to go forward for prayers (my parents were waiting for me downstairs but I couldn’t leave without going forward for prayers!). Therefore, I went over to the pastor’s wife from New Life Church and I told her what happened to me. She prayed for me. Then later on, the aunty from Germany saw me and she asked me; “What can I pray for you?” I told her, “Anything, just anything”. I couldn’t say much because of my shaking. She laid her hands on me and prayed for me (another aunty was praying for me too). As soon as she laid her hands on me, the Lord spoke through her for almost 15 minutes. What God told her to tell me was so powerful and it touched my heart. Besides that, my visions and dreams connected to what she prophesied. Here were the prophecies I received through her: “God will pour down His blessings upon you. He will fill you and the blessings will pour out like a cup that overflows. The water that flows out will touch MANY SOULS and you will reach out to many people around you…God is going to use you mightily and you are going to preach the Gospel to MANY NATIONS and therefore go out INTO THE NATIONS. Not just in Malaysia, but you will step out of Malaysia and into the NATIONS of the WORLD. He will send someone on your path. Someone who is going to help and support you in your MINISTRY etc…” Furthermore, on 19th and 20th of February 2006 during the church service and during my prayer session, God showed me how He was crucified on the cross in my vision.

Few weeks later, God put the burden for souls in my heart especially when He gave me another dream. The dreams and visions that I had were heart breaking especially to know that it ‘really happened’ just a few days later. During my school holiday from the 11-19th March, I went to Kota Kinabalu, Sabah (east-Malaysia) with my parents again.

Early in the morning on Wednesday the 15. Probably around 3am, I had a dream. I found myself in a very big area surrounded by trees and there was an abandoned two-story wooden house in the middle of that area. It seemed to be a green forest but it was near the beach. The weather was fine and I could hear people walking, talking, running, and having fun. Suddenly, the sky turned dark and cloudy. There came the strong wind and it started to rain. The fierce and strong wind plus the rain made the people panic. Many people were running and screaming, grabbing each other’s hand; searching for shelter and a hiding place to protect themselves. The wind and rain got even stronger and fiercer. The sound of the wind was so terrible in my ears and it was so scary. The trees were moving wildly, the branches broke and there were branches and debris flying everywhere. Although I could not see myself at the scene, I could feel the pain that the people felt when they were hit and pierced by the debris flying around them. It was like being hit by hailstones. The people whom I saw were the whites or the westerners.

Remember the wooden house I mentioned, it was badly smashed because of the flying debris. Then, I saw myself in that house. I was standing at the corner of the empty living room facing the dirty window. The house was shaking and I could hear the strong wind from inside the house. It was a horrible experience to see the windows smashed, the branches of the trees slammed into the house. At any moment, the house would topple and collapse. As I was standing there looking outside, tears started to flow down my eyes…

Few days later after having this dream, God gave me another dream. Early in the morning on Friday 17th, I saw myself in a car driven by someone (a Christian but not close to God). As we were moving along the beach, the sea was so rough and the current was so strong. It was neither a tsunami nor flash flood. I didn’t know what was happening. Then, we came across a long straight road whereby there were seas on both sides of the road. Along the road/path, there were coconut trees. At the end of the road, all I could see was brightness. When the man was driving along the road, there were two strong winds coming from each side and the wave slammed onto the dry land; the road. When the man saw what was happening, he was afraid to drive on. So, he u-turned and went back instead of driving forward. When I woke up that morning, I asked God what was all that about and He answered me after I drew what I saw in my journal. Around 11:50pm, (my parents were asleep so I took this quiet time to seek God’s explanation); I prayed and asked God to reveal the meaning to me about the dream. At 12:00am, just after I finished drawing my dream, God spoke to my heart and He explained my dream like this:

The dry land/road is the way to life. (There is still hope) “Jesus is the way, the truth and the life”. That was why I saw the brightness at the end of the road. In addition, God said many people have forgotten Him. When it comes to times of trouble and difficulties, not many will want to go through that way; they rather turn back and follow their own ways (their easier way). They did not know that even though they had to take the tough and difficult way, God WOULD lead them. He IS always there to guide them. No matter what, if we follow Him and believe that we can go through those trials with Him, He WILL reward each one who walks with Him and that is LIFE. Disaster will come from both sides (the western and eastern sea) but HOPE WILL NEVER END. Even Christians can turn away from God but God had made the way straight and we must keep on going forward therefore not to turn back. On March 29th, I read in the scripture and God explained some more about this dream. Please read Isaiah 43 ‘especially’ in verse 1-7. The promises are always there.

Regarding the dream I had on the 15th, I went back home to Bintulu (my hometown in Malaysia) on Saturday the18th and on Sunday the following day I read in the papers about what had happened in Australia. The cyclone that hit the eastern side of Australia was a shocking news for me since I dreamt about it a few days before. Each time when I read in the news about the disasters, I can’t hold back my tears! The dreams and visions that I had ever since I was 11 years old, they ARE happening now in this end times. Plane crashes (I dreamt about this on the 5th Sept 2000 and it really happened on Sept 11, 2001; and is happening more than before; in 2004 I dreamt about more plane crashes for two nights), wars (dreamt together with the plane crashes, nuclear bombs, fires, earthquakes on Sept 5th 2000), earthquakes (connected to my dream on the 5th Sept 2000 because this dream was about the end times happening), tsunami (dreamt few months before Dec 26, 2004; some more but worst will happen), hurricanes (dreamt about this at least twice), tornadoes, fires (just like hell), flash floods (middle of Nov 2005, I dreamt about it and it really happened in Dec 2005), volcano eruption (soon but some more will happen elsewhere), and cyclone (dreamt about this for two times in March 2006)! Jesus is coming soon, sooner than what we think!

Sometimes God spoke to me directly into my ears. He gave me verses in the Bible especially about what will happen to me and what I should do to stand firm. He is so good! He gave me verses like in 1 Timothy 4:6,11-15/ 2 Timothy 4:2-5/ 1Peter 3:8-22; 4; 5/ Romans 8/ 1 Corinthians 14…Some of my favorite verses are taken from the book of acts (Acts 2:17-21/ Joel 2:28-32), from John 10:27, Isaiah 40:31 and more. (All of His words are important to us).

On Saturday April 15 2006, the day after Good Friday, I went to the S.I.B in Medan Jaya, Bintulu for the special combined Youth Service. Just after the service, I went home around six in the evening. On my way home, I saw this huge marvelous rainbow in the sky. In the Bible, we read about God’s Covenant from Genesis 9:12-16; God said, “This is the sign of the covenant I am making between me and you and every living creature with you, a covenant for all generations to come: I have set my rainbow in the clouds, and it will be the sign of the covenant between me and the earth. Whenever I bring clouds over the earth and the rainbow appears in the clouds, I will remember my covenant between me and you and all living creatures of every kind…Whenever the rainbow appears in the clouds, I will see it and remember the everlasting covenant between God and all living creatures of every kind on the earth.”

Remember the vision I had one week after new year’s day (2006), I read in the papers on 17th April 2006 and was shocked to read this:

-”JAVA VOLCANO MAY ERUPT ANYTIME” …Indonesian President Susilo Bambang Yudhoyono yesterday warned people living on the slopes of ‘Mount MERAPI’ in densely-populated Central Java province that the volcano could erupt anytime…”MERAPI is currently active and could explode or emit lava from its crater anytime,” Yudhoyono said…-

On May 9th, around 10:50pm, I was watching a Christian Program and I prayed. During my prayers, I had a tearful vision…

I saw a man standing alone at the corner of a dark place in this world; feeling lost, sad, left behind… He was looking up to the heavens; wondering aimlessly. An angel was standing brightly in the clouds and I saw the dead been raptured and next, those followers of Christ were raptured too. I saw many souls been raptured except this man. When I saw him standing in the dark, I felt so sad for him… I do not want to be like him, I do not want others to be like him, God wants us back, God wants His children to come back to Him. From this vision, we knew of the light God provided. He is the light of the world. Many of them are lost in the dark… When Christ comes again, many people will be like that man but God has given us HOPE through Jesus Christ; His son. “The Lord is my Light and my Salvation…,” Psalm 27. The Lord wants to help you in your life. Jesus said in Matthew 11:28-30, “Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For my yoke is easy and my burden is light.”

The Lord gave me another vision when I went for my holiday together with my family.

On 6th June 2006, around 7:45pm, my dad, my mom, and I prayed for my sister because of certain things. As we were praying for her, I had a beautiful vision. I saw a child sitting alone on a hill, facing the open sea. The sun was shining brightly from the west. Then, there was a bright cross next to the child. As soon as I prayed for my sister, the Lord spoke through me. I was crying at the same time because of HIS words. Apart from that, I know that HIS words are not just for my sister but also for everyone. The SUN represents Jesus Christ (the SON of GOD). HIS GLORY will shine forever onto the people of this earth (HIS CHILDREN). HIS LOVE is as vast as the sky and wide as the sea. The CROSS represents HIMSELF/HIS PRESENCE in our life. Although sometimes we feel like we are lonely, no one cares about us, people hurt our feelings, hate us, or even say something bad about us, He is always standing by next to us. HE longs to touch, hug, talk, comfort, forgive, and love us. He cares about us so much. Many times people ignore Him and seldom talk to Him. He feels very sad but He is always waiting for us. (Please read Psalm 121) After my sister asked God to forgive her sins etc, I saw three angels looking down from the sky on the clouds; in my vision. They were rejoicing! Then, I saw the cross disappeared but the child was still sitting there. I knew that JESUS IS in the child. The child is not alone because Christ is in her. The child represents not just my sister but also to those who ask JESUS to come into their life. 

Then, on 28th May 2006, I received another prophecy from a visiting pastor and his wife, who came from New Zealand. I went to a Church in Bintulu for the service. First of all, during the last session of that Sunday service, there was an altar call for those who needed prayers. I wanted to go forward for prayers but my father wanted to send me home. Surprisingly, the pastor’s wife from this Church walked towards me and she told me, “do you want to be prayed for, why not you go forward for prayers…someone else will send you home.” I was so happy. Therefore, I told my dad about it. Then, I went to the front while the couple was praying for the others. Deep within my spirit, I knew God had something to tell me. In addition, I waited for the Lord to speak to me… all I heard was “wait…be patience”. After I waited for almost half an hour, the visiting pastor walked towards me, the first thing he asked me was, “is there any specific need or prayers you need?”, and the first word that came out from my mouth was, “my future”.

The couple started to pray for me and from there, the Lord spoke through the visiting pastor regarding my future. He said that God has a great purpose for my future and He is very interested in my future. God has put my life in His path and it was already the beginning of His great plan. God said that I am already walking on His path. He is going to open the door and I will walk through it. There will be showers of blessings in my future. The Lord had planned my future and all I have to do is to continue to walk in His path… In the midst of his prayer, God gave me a beautiful vision of a place. In the vision, I stood on a very wide and narrow road. It was a tar road leading to a big city, which was further down on the right side. On my left, I saw a very beautiful sea/river. When I stood on the road, I noticed that there were huge arrows on the road and the Lord reminded me to continue going forward. That was the road leading to my future and it was so beautiful and sparkling clean! By the way, I was amazed to see the city because there were so many high-rise buildings. Besides, I saw trees/ bushes nearby the city and there was a big empty area on the right side of the land.

A few weeks later, that was on 20th June 2006, a sister from Perth (my prayer partner) came to visit me in Bintulu for the first time. Actually a lady friend in Perth introduced her to me. I never met her before, neither did I know her. Gradually, we e-mail spiritual matters, back and forth. The following night, she came to my home together with this lady friend who stayed in Perth and we had fellowship together. My mom was with us too. While they were praying, I felt the presence of the Lord among us. There were at least two angels standing by my side and I felt their wings flipping around me. At that time, I closed my hands and bowed my head. When I felt the wings of the angels flipping around me, my body became warmer and warmer at the same time. Besides, I felt the burning heat in my hands and I couldn’t move much because of the heaviness from the top of my head to the soles of my feet. It was a unique feeling as if something heavy and hard was put on me. Just after the other aunt prayed, I was supposed to continue the prayers but I kept quiet. The presence of the Lord was too strong until I couldn’t say much. I just wanted to be still and be in His peaceful presence. However, my prayer partner, who was praising God, somehow said that she felt the Lord’s presence around me. Immediately after she mentioned that, my body became even hotter and the anointing was so strong. She put her hands near my body and she could feel the warm heat. Therefore, she put her hands near my head and started praying for me.

Later on, God spoke through her and she prophesied to me: “You are prepared for mission (going out to the nations)… there are many prophets of old… just like Moses; anointed and being the prophet that leads the people out of Egypt. Like how God anointed Moses in the old days, He is doing the same to you. You are a prophet ready for mission… You will have more dreams and visions… revelations… You will be blessed… You will touch people and they will be healed… You will have a deep impact especially among the youths…etc!” Furthermore, she saw the full armor on me including a PURPLE mantle. She said that she saw the crown on my head, the sword in my hand, the breastplate, the shield, the belt around my waist, and the iron shoes.

After the prayer session, I had a talk with my prayer partner and I described to her the city which I saw in my vision. Surprisingly, she told me it looked exactly like Perth City! That includes the Swan River, the Fremantle Park, and the city itself. From where I stood in the vision, I was actually standing on the southern part of Perth and I was looking towards the city which was on the northern side. Through all these prophecies, God had called me to go for mission and to preach the good news to all nations. After I knew the direction where God wanted me to go, I sought Him more. Finally, I came to know about a school called Youth With A Mission, Perth, Australia. From there, I applied for the January’s Young People’s Discipleship Training School. Throughout my application process for this school, God had never disappointed me. He planned everything perfectly according to His timing. With some help from some aunties and uncles, I managed to get my visa, medical process, and police clearance check, done without any problem. With God’s blessing, my parents managed to get the exact financial need for my course. After I completed my high school studies. I went to this school called Young People’s Discipleship Training School (YP DTS) at YWAM Perth the following year on 5th January 2007. The school started on the 7th…

(TO BE CONTINUED…….)

Jesus is coming soon, indeed; sooner than we think!
*May God’s will be done! May His Kingdom come!

Jesus said, “…if two of you on earth agree about anything you ask for, it will be done for you by my Father in heaven. For where two or three come together in my name, there I am with them.” (Matthew 18:19-20, NIV)

May God bless all of you!
With love and prayers in Jesus name,
Candy Rosette

 
Hebrews 11:40, “God had planned something better for us so that only together with us would they be made perfect.” (NIV)

p/s: I only updated the last few paragraphs. Sorry for some grammar errors
“My Life Walking with God With Dreams and Visions” is another link whereby I post the same testimonies… (there’re more comments at this link)

Praise The Lord

Here im sharing the testimony
which i have experienced very close to my heart,this is the first time im
sharing a testimony in my life.

I live in hyderabad and my parents recide at a
place called medak in A.P.
One day, approx., over a month back i got a call
from my parents,that they have fallen sick due to high fever and wanted me to be there with them , the very next day i left for medak.

I was suprised and sad to see them in such a horrible condition, they were not able to move, to the extent not even able to do their own chores because of high fever and severe body pains.I was litteraly shattered witnessing them in that condition,,becoz never came a situation like that before,i composed myself and prayed to LORD with a heavy heart.

Next day i have taken them to hospital,there doctor diagnosed it as viral infection,and said that it wud take atleast one month for complete recovery and prescirbed some medicines.

Following three days they were completely on celine and little fluid intake.
Mean while i have called up jesuscalls prayer tower.Their,prayer warrior did a wonderful
prayer, which has given me much needed moral support and it further increased my faith and believe in GOD’S amazing grace and i was instructed by prayer warrior to apply prayer oil to my parents,myself and to sprinkle water with prayer oil on all the doors and the windows.I did the same.

Gradualy the condition starded improving, from unmovable state in bed progressed to slow walking with some assistance !!!HALLELUJAH!!! (((PRAISE THE LORD))).After one week fever receded to normal .::THANK GOD::. next week they were on strength gaining diet, for which they responded positively.

After two weeks from the date of falling sick,they were completely recovered.
THANK U LORD - THE TRUE LIVING GOD.

Friends i want to share a very little fact with u — whenever we find ourselves in hapless situation we automatically lean onto LORD and start praying more fervently than before.

Though we go to church, read the BIBLE and do prayers, we continue our daily lifes with so many sins injected in without our knowledge becoz we dont put into deeds what we hear in church and what we read in BIBLE and live with the misconception that it is very much ok. We can realise these discrepancies in our lifes only after when we shaken up by a sudden jolt, then we realise

that — Ohh!..NO! i was doing this,,,sorry LORD and Ohh!..NO! i was doing that,,, forgive me LORD,,, there you start analysing your life and start shredding each transgression which was ok before.Day by day You wud shook off every sin from your life… which is the desire of our LORD JESUS CHRIST.

GOD loves us so much that HE punishes us for our mistakes or in other words frames troubles in our lifes whenever we are going astray,,,so that we realise our mistakes and reconcile ourselves to HIM.This is our preparation inorder to enter into HEAVEN which is an everlasting life - the abode of GOD and THE ANGELS.

It was in the month of March that I lost my job and my health on the same day.
My Doctor diagnosed high blood sugar and cholesterol..I was broken down beyond everything..lost complete hope,liking and ambition in life..life stated to look hell for me..at the age of 32, future looked blank without any desire..My doctor put me on high dosage to lower my sugar and cholesterol readings…but I was a man of nothing loosing my job and health at the same time..I would always break down and cry to my Lord Jesus asking him why why why..and my mom,wife and myself would cry out to the Lord for help which he heard…after 2 weeks my wife’s friend called us for a revival meeting..that day I was extremely tired, but heard the lord saying”Go I will be there”, and so I went for the meeting..for all my surprise I could feel Jesus sitting next to me and talking to me which I heard when I wanted to keep the Bible next to me,he would say “why are you keeping the bible on me”,all the way he was talking to me till the Pastor called me to the pulpit and laid his hands on me and said “God has healed you, you will always be protected by him PSALM 4-12, and he also said that God has blessed your seed and I will be very successful man and I will be a very big man…after this blessing when I went back to my seat Jesus had left.

When I came back home that night and checked my sugar reading…Praise the Lord it was normal and after a weak my wife was pregnant.

My doctor was surprised after reading the new lab reports..which was normal and he just could’nt believe and said I was one rare patient..but I told him that I was touched by my Lord Jesus who healed me for he Loves me.

My wife and I were living in Lexington, Ky and she was pregnant with our first son.  On one of her ultrasounds, the doctor noticed his left kidney was enlarged.  He was born 2-2-95 and the doctors didn’t wait long before they scheduled him for some tests.  I don’t remember exactly how old he was for the first test but I’m guessing he was around 1 year old.  They had us place him under a scope then inject his IV with dye (my wife did his IV since she is a nurse).  After a few minutes he was given a diuretic to force his kidneys to empty fairly quickly then they would compare the time it took each kidney to do so.  His left one was definitely blocked.  The small tube (ureter) that leads from the kidney to his bladder was narrowed.  We went in several times and the results were always the same.  The urologist spoke with us after one of the tests and said he recommended surgery.  He said they needed to cut out the narrowed section and reattach the ureter to the kidney.  We didn’t want Samuel to go through it because at that time he wasn’t experiencing any complications but on the other hand, the doctor explained the surgery would be worse if we were to put it off. 

The day of the surgery was when it really hit me;  seeing him being wheeled down the hallway in the little red wagon the OR nurses were pulling him in was almost so frightening to me that I could hardly breathe.  We had many friends and family there with us but I felt so helpless for him.  We also had several friends from our church there.  If possible, I would have traded positions with him in an instant.  He came out of surgery fine and the nurses and doctors said he did great.  He recovered well over the next several weeks then it was time for another dye test.  It was a shock to us what we saw during that test.  Samuel’s kidney remained enlarged and the ureter was still narrow leading to his bladder!  How could this be?  The doctor said sometime’s that happens when the ureter that was cut and shortened develops another block due to it’s being stretched.  We had prayed several times with this doctor and we trusted him.  Even after this latest result.  Over the next couple of months we continued with the tests but the problem never got better. 

One day the doctor said Samuel would need to another surgery to try and open the ureter some more.   What else could we do?  The doctor said he could eventually develop bad kidney infections and possibly need surgery to remove it.  We agreed for the second surgery but I never felt right about it.  I never told my wife but I had several nightmares about it.  I was being told in my dreams that he didn’t make it through surgery and I would wake up feeling as though I was going to collapse.  I wanted to remain strong especially for my wife because we didn’t feel there were any other options for him.   We had Samuel put on the church’s prayer list before his surgery.  My parents did the same at their church.  My mother-in-law put him on the prayer list at her church.  I had a close friend I worked with pray with me many times.  Despite all this I still remained uneasy about the surgery.  We had one more dye test to put him through.

This last dye test was scheduled about 2 days before surgery and was to help the doctors confirm the narrowed section and for them to get an idea of the size of the kidney.  The nurses doing the procedure had come to know us pretty well and were sorry to know he needed the second surgery.  When the dye was injected, I no longer studied to screen to watch the kidney fill then empty.  My focus was more on Samuel and his comfort level.  I had gotten to the point where I new what to expect and didn’t want to see it on the computer screen.  I looked at the nurse and noticed a puzzled expression.  Then I saw the monitor.  Both kidneys were emptying at the same rate!  The nurse did some troubleshooting thinking something was wrong with the setup but eventually shook her head and said his ureter appeared normal.  The doctor was called and he could not explain what happened.  We took him in for one more dye test several days later and it was again normal. 

Samuel is now 12, has 4 younger brothers, 1 sister, and is doing excellent.  We don’t go in for dye tests and other than his small scar, you’d never know he ever had a problem.   I am convinced it was the work of God and evidence for the tremendous power of prayer!

My earliest memories are of nightmares. As a young boy living in Oklahoma I seemed to have a pretty good life. My mother and father worked and I grew up in daycare. I had three half brothers and a half sister though I never met her until years later. Family life was rough. My father was constantly in debt and addicted to alcohol and drugs. He abused my mother on a regular basis and I think it was this environment that left me open to such spiritual attack as a child. From the age of two I would have nightmares of monsters and boogie men. One night I remember laying in bed trying to sleep after a particularly bad fight and looking at my night light. It had a glass base with a sculpture inside of a little boy who had been fishing. He was feeding his earthworms to some little birds in a nest. It had been a comforting scene in the past. This night though I remember the sculpture turning to look at me. It appeared then as if the boy came out of the glass and was a menacing presence. I got scared and shut my eyes. This had always worked in the past if I just shut my eyes it would go away. Only this time I didn’t. So I jumped out of bed and ran to my parents room. They had somehow made up after yet another fight and were both asleep. I stood in the hallway looking at them then I turned to look back down at my room and the boy was already on his way down the hall after me. I screamed and jumped into bed with my parents. The boy came into the room. I hid my head under the covers as my parents stirred. The boy had vanished and I found rest in their bed that night.

Some time later, when dad began to beat me, mom decided it was time for us to leave. So one day instead of daycare I stayed home with mom. My uncles from Texas showed up in trucks and a Uhaul and we left. We moved to Texas without my dad knowing that we were even thinking of going. I missed him terribly and didn’t understand why we had to go. I was almost five when we moved to Texas. Life was fun at first we stayed on my grandparents farm where I had fun with my two cousins and in many ways they became the serrogate brothers to replace the ones I had left behind.

I had a hard time differentiating between truth and story growing up. When my cousins and I would tell ghosts stories I would get overtaken by an intense fear. It didn’t help that my grandparents farm house was a two story farm home over two hundred years old and most of my aunts and uncles all had their ghost stories about it.

After a few months of living on the farm my mother found a job in the city and we moved into a duplex. I was still plagued by nightmares and scary visions. Our new home in town had a small berry bush outside my mothers window and I remember one time I saw a black almost shadow like substance dart into that bush and disappear.

My parents had attended a protestant church in Oklahoma and I had been raised with a basic Sunday School knowledge of God and Jesus. I didn’t understand why we had left Oklahoma and I cursed God on a regular basis for taking me from my father. I had a conversation at some point with my father over the phone and he told me that the Devil had my mother and that it was my job to pray for them to get back together. I got occasional letters from my father but when I was nine he died. It was at his funeral that I met my half sister for the first, and only, time. My fathers death embittered me toward God and I became increasingly iconoclastic.

While I was in elementary school I was also diagnosed with Aortic Valvular Stenosis of the left ventricle artery. My diagnosis was grim. I don’t remember all the ins and outs of it but I wasn’t expected to live long past my teens and I was immediately taken out of all athletics in school. Teachers were scared because I would come in from lunch pale and with purple lips after playing on the playground.

Life became harder. My mother couldn’t find any insurance to take me because I was a guaranteed loss. She was working as an accountant for a bar behind our house and was constantly worried and stressed out. My mother had been raised Catholic and left the church as soon as she left the house. She raised me to believe that organized religion was not to be trusted and that no one belief was better than another. She taught me that to experiment with drugs was expected but never to do anything too hard. She also introduced me to witchcraft. She unknowingly taught me that when dealing with spiritual things she had learned from some hippies in the 60’s that you were supposed to make a circle around yourself to keep out bad spirits.

It was around that same time that I discovered a passion for reading. My favorite books pertained to magic and dragons anything to escape and get me away from the pain of the real world. I delved at a young age into eastern mysticism and into Native American religions. I remember at one point I felt so in tune with the spiritual energies around me that i could run through my backyard out into the front yard and not even need to stop to open the gate in front of me. It would open before me and shut behind me.

In the midst of my growing interest with the very things I had lived in fear of for so long I remember telling God that I was tired of being “sick” and I wanted to be able to play like a normal boy.

I also remember making the conscious decision to no longer be afraid of the things that went bump in the night but to instead be the thing that people feared.

In the seventh grade I found a friend in english class who also read many of the same fantasy and horror books that I did. We became fast friends sharing this in common. It was around that same time that bullies became a real problem and he and I were both bullied by a group of older boys. That summer I hit puberty and became larger than the bullies and they quit bullying me.

I went on to high school but my middle school buddy did not go to the same school I did, so I had to start over and found friends once again that read all the same books I did. On one particularly bad day I was sitting in the lunch room with an older friend and began discussing a character out of one of our books. This character was easily identified with by me because of his sick weakly stature, but he became a wizard and soon both challenged and managed to kill a Goddess in the series. I remember asking my friend if he ever wished that all that magic stuff was real and looked me square in the eye and said that it was. He wanted to show me so I came over to his house for a sleep over one weekend. He pulled several store bought spell books and psychic manuals. We immediately began to try putting out candle flames with our minds and found some exciting success. That night I became a witch.

By my sophomore year there was a core group of five male witches at our high school. One of the guys mother was a member of the Texas Council for Magickal Arts and so we all had a pretty good hook up into the occult. We all frequented the new age and witchcraft shops around town. i became adept and finding and communicating with “Spirit Guides” reading Tarot cards and the like. My friends and I would all have sleep overs and practice witchcraft together. I lived this way from my freshman year of high School until I was 21 years old.

It was after I graduated high school that I delved deeper and more seriously into the witchcraft. Out of high school I had no goals or plan for life so I went to Massage Therapy school. I also learned Reiki which is simply another form of Witchcraft. I remember in the class at the end of it we went through a guided mediation to meet with a powerful spirit guide. In the vision I didn’t find a spirit guide but I saw myself standing at the feet of Jesus sitting on a throne frozen in a block of ice. The vision so disturbed me that I wouldn’t share it with the others in the class.

While I was in classes I found a job working at the mall in a seasonal Halloween store. There I met two lesbian witches and two Christians. I was really taken by the beauty of one of the Christians and instantly thought she was out of my league. By the end of the season though she and I were dating and sleeping together.

It was because of her parents that I first went to church. They were threatening to break us up if I didn’t at least visit their church. They had been told by their daughter that I attended another local church. So I did what any good witch would do for the sake of so called love, I geared up with all of my amulets and talismans underneath my shirt and I went with her to church. I had heard of this church it was a charismatic mega church and among the witchcraft community it was rumored that these Christians were crazy. I instantly disliked the businessy feel of the building but when I made it into the main Sanctuary I saw this bald, goatee clad man with an electric guitar rocking out in worship and I thought, “Man this looks nothing like my grandmothers Catholic Church.”

By the end of service I had so enjoyed myself that I told my girlfriend we could go back sometime if her parents forced us to.

Eventually the girl and I became engaged. One late evening after she had been hanging out with a witch friend and me, I asked her what she thought of my “religion”. Up to this point I had always been very confrontational about Christianity and could out argue her easily because she was lukewarm at best and had no idea how to defend a faith she herself didn’t practice. This night was different though…I had been explaining to my witch friend a new character I had developed for a role playing game I designed. When out of my mouth, not even in my voice, I began to quote scripture and explain the nature of truth to my friend. My fiance recognized it as scripture and was blown away by what I had just said, but I just played it off as if “just because I wasn’t a Christian didn’t mean I didn’t know what the Bible said”. My witch friend applauded my speech and went home. I was shaken by the experience and somehow was open to hearing what my fiance had to say about my religion.

So I asked her, “What do you think of my religion?”, she simply responded that it was demon worship. I flew off the handle with her and drove her home.

Later that night I was performing a ritual and cast my circle. I was surrounded by years worth of acquired witchcraft paraphernalia. Incense was burning as a sacrifice to my idols I had around the room. A Buddha, dancing Shiva, Tiki head, etc. and I sat on my bed enfolded in my robe and began to think this one thought. “What if she’s right?” My mind began to repeat that question and I grew cold and a cloud seemed to descend upon the room. Even though it was lit by many candles it became difficult to see and I once again got under my covers and tried to shut my eyes to lock out the fear, just as I had done so often as a little boy. I peeked out and it was as if a curtain had been lifted and I saw all around me not idols of wood and brass but laughing mocking figures that had no good intentions for me, but the evil had almost a physical presence. I despaired.

Just then in the deepest fear I had ever felt a voice spoke to me. Not like the voices of the spirits I had long communicated with but a voice of gentle rain, but also powerful thunder. It was a warm voice and a soothing voice and with two words it banished the fear and the images. The voice simply said “I AM“. The voice was so real and shocking that I jumped from my bed and began looking through my house believing that a friend was playing some trick on me. I found no one though and I blew out the candles snuffed the incense and as I began to fall asleep I heard another similar voice begin to tell me how much He loved me and I drifted off.

Six months later my fiance and I had completed our pre-marriage classes and went for our first meeting with the pastor she had chosen to marry us. He was a kindly older gentleman by the name of Phil Mercado. He began speaking to us and asked us where we were with the Lord. Now my fiance knew this was coming and she had been coaching me on the drive to the church to say that Jesus Christ was my Lord and Savior. I told her I got it and to shut up and leave me alone. So Pastor Phil says, “I don’t know you that well so tell me if you were to die today where would you go?” I said Heaven. To me heaven was an ambiguous place like the Elysian fields or the happy hunting grounds. He followed up by asking me “Why?”. I was dumb founded. I knew somehow I was supposed to say that Jesus Christ was my Lord and Savior but the words would not come out of my mouth. I sputtered some drivel about W.W.J.D. and always trying to do the right thing. Pastor Phils’ face fell, he opened his bible and shared the Romans road with me and then he said that for his own sake would we object to being led in a prayer. We agreed and got down on our knees there in his office in front of his desk. I repeated the words he was saying but in my mind it was as if I was kneeling before the feet of Jesus once again only this time he wasn’t frozen in a block of ice but was clothed in glory. I realized in that moment that my whole life everyone had been wrong. I realized that it didn’t matter that my mother thought religion was a crutch or that all my friends thought Christians were hypocrites. It only mattered in between me and Jesus and I accepted Him to be my Lord.

On the drive home I told my fiance that I had meant the prayer and she got visibly upset with me.

Three times before we were married God told me distinctly not to marry her but I did anyway. I mean the invitations were already sent out what was God thinking? He would just have to deal with it. As I grew closer to God she ran farther away. As a gift to her I set up a computer for her to use. Once again God told me in no uncertain terms not to set up the computer. I had promised already and did it anyway. Three months in to the marriage she met a guy online and left. She was the one thing at that point in my life that was more important than God and she was finally gone. I broke before the Lord and praised Him in my pain and sorrow. A few weeks later I lay on the couch and was reading my Bible. In Exodus Moses goes up the mountain to get the commandments and he questions God. He says to God how will the people know that I didn’t just make this stuff up but that it is from you. God says to tell the people His Name. Moses says what’s your name God and God replies “I AM“.

I got the chills and saw Gods providence in my life. That incurable degenerative disease? I was healed at some time. A few years after the initial disease I enrolled in Judo classes. One of the men in the class heard me talking about my condition and couldn’t believe the diagnosis. He read EKG’s and such. So he snuck me into the hospital (no insurance remember) and ran the tests on me. There was no heart disease. He told my mom to take the print out and have several specialists around the state and country read them but there was no disease there. His thought was that there had never been a heart condition. But my mother had the old printouts that showed it as well. I was healed. Even in my anger and hatred of God He had healed me, because He had a plan and a purpose for me.

After I was saved and my first wife had left I gathered up all the old witchcraft books and stuff I could find. Anything that wasn’t pleasing to God really. Cd’s, books, games, magazines, movies, etc. and I burned them all in my backyard. As the pillar of smoke rose from the flames I saw an evil face appear resembling one of the many evil spirits I had encountered in my years of witchcraft. The face came at me with the appearance of a scream and broke over me. Then it dissipated and the smoke continued to rise straight up into the night. I had Jesus now and for the first time in my life I didn’t have to fear any longer.

P.S. I am now a Youth Pastor and married to a beautiful Christian woman who loves the Lord and am the father of a wonderful little girl.

About 2 years ago, I was on holiday with my parents at to Ikare in southwest Nigeria. I suddenly realised that I urinated excessively after any carbohydrate meal and I began to lose weight. A physician diagnosed Diabetes mellitus which was scary to me considering that I was only 22. I was very perplexed and confused but in the process I came across some christian tapes. They inspired me and idecided to take my case to God, the holy spirit  inspired me to go on a three day special fasting and prayer session which I did. A day after the fasting and prayer I purged and felt very light and tired. I instantly knew something has changed… 2 years after, I have been eating and drinking what I like since then and I havent fell ill once. It provided me the opportunity to meet christ and become born again, my life hasn’t been the same ever since. I want you to know he can do the same in your life too if you give him the chance.

Hello,

I want to tell you things that Jesus did for me.  But before I get there, I have to go back to my youth.

I wasn’t raised with God or any other religion. I was raised according to my parents’ intuition.

I have had a terrible youth. I have a history with people who have humiliated me and were pulling me down and down and down in my feeling of beeing worthy.  It started at my kindergarden school. It didn’t stop till I quit my education to become a nurse.

It was really dramatic when my 4 years younger sister was born. My sister was 6,5 week too early. She was ill during the pregnancy and that’s why they let her come so early, they didn’t have a choice.

For me, as a 4 years old girl, it wasn’t dramatic, it was traumatic. From my eyes, my mom got ripped out of my sight, I was brought to my babysitter, for 3 weeks. And nobody told me what was happening. Now I understand why: it was just too difficult for everyone to tell a little girl.

I have done stupid things. I have made stories up. Like: boyfriends, illnesses, even a pregnancy of myself, and because that wasn’t true, also a miscarriage. I don’t know why exactly. May be it was about to feel love and care from the attention people gave. Or may be it’s a very deep desire to have a boyfriend and to have a baby in my life.  I just know I’ve hurt people with those stories, and especially myself.

Last year I was diagnosed with Borderline personality disorder.  In my life it have meant, and still means that it’s hard to get involved with relationships and to keep them. I means much more for me and it is really difficult to deal with sometimes, if I just want to do what my path is.  Because of the Borderline, it is very difficult for me to succeed in a job or anything with a curtain presure.

At one time, a very good friend of mine spoke prophesies over me. She has dreams about lots of things. And there was a whole week and she was dreaming a lot about me. She said that she has seen me fighting with the devil. And that was what I was feeling, but I was afraid to say things. She also said that the pastor’s wife from my church would understand and would be able to help me.

So as my friend told me to, I went to the pastor’s wife. We prayed and fasted together for 40 days. To be honest, I didn’t do 1 single day how we suppose to do it, but even because it didn’t keep it, I still prayed and made sacrifices.

I grew so much because of it. After we did the 40 days of fasting, God answered our prayers and He visited me. He came unexpected and with lots of strength. The pastor’s wife allready warned me to expect a lot from Him. I had to be ready for a huge deliverance, healing, and even manifestations.  when He came, He came with lots of strength. But it was like God was telling me: “don’t be afraid of My strength. If I come, I come with Love and Comfter. Things I do in your life, might hurt, but I am always staying to catch you if you fall and to comfter you when it hurts. I turn My arms around you and give you My love.” Because of that, I wasn’t scared for His strength anymore. I let Him come to me, and He ripped all scars and reasons of the wounds I had away from me. he touched my sore point. Places, I have never let anyone come close to ever in my life. But God gave me the trust I needed. And it hurt, but now, It’s all gone.

God has set me free from all of my history.  For the first time in my life I had trouble breathing. Because I felt my breath through my whole beeing. I always felt the air through my body, but now I felt it through my soul. As it was cleaning all the little left overs from all the wounds and scars.

Now I trust God more than anything in my whole life. Everything I’ve ever trusted, left me and disappointed me, God prooved me His Word and that He keeps His promiss.

Like my title says: I never felt I would feel or get better…. But since then, I feel amazing! I am praying more than I notice, and I’m worshipping more than I feel.

God is great. And with Him: All things are possible. And He has proved it.